I watch dvds.  Some might say I'm addicted.  Those people would probably be right.  Going by my excel spreadsheet that I use for organization(not the similar word file...its not numbered.), I currently own roughly 433 movies and 134 TV releases.  Of those, I havent watched the dvds of roughly 197 movies and 36 TV releases.  So yeah, dvds are my heroin probably (though cheaper and more satisfying than heroin I'd wager, I wouldn't know).

One of the reasons I'm a far greater fan of DVD than I ever was of VHS (besides the fact that vhs hit when I was younger) is that DVD has the ability to add extra features, as everyone knows.  I have simple tastes generally though.  For example, I actually like the inclusion of Theatrical Trailers a lot more than most probably do (which is why I just uploaded the trailers for all the films I've reviewed).  But I'm no fool, I know what a great feature is.  Some of my overall horror favorites include the Working With A Master and Interview with a Master featurettes on almost every ep of Masters of Horror in Season One, the "Labyrinth" on the Nightmare on Elm Street box set (informative...yet waay complicated), the Silent Night, Deadly Night slideshow of bad reviews (more movies should revel in their bad reviews), the zombie thoughts subtitles on the most recent version of Return of the Living Dead (because that's just freaking creative), the short film "Rings" on the dvd of Ring Two (nice way to bridge the story), and the Gerald McBoingBoing cartoons on the Hellboy 2-disc (because why the heck would you expect that?).

Which brings me to the greatest feature I've ever seen.  Like the Gerald McBoingboing cartoons, I had no reason to see this coming (outside of packaging advertising of course).  You may have noticed my new review of the French (and sorta Georgian) noir thriller 13 Tzameti.  I praised the movie's simplicity pretty well in the review, but I left out something on purpose to discuss it here.  For a kinda underground, sorta-unknown release, 13 Tzameti has a SURPRISINGLY packed DVD.  Besides interviews with the director and the two actors I mention, there's a rather interesting interview that's kinda nebulous.  Appears to be a guy who actually bets on something similar to the plot of the movie trying to explain and justify his actions in an interview.  Very sociologically appealing.

But that's all an appetizer for the single greatest special feature I've ever seen.  For also on this disc, advertised on the back, is "Sunday's Game - A short film about some nice old ladies".  "Sunday's Game" is a great short in some ways by being everything that 13 Tzameti is not. Game is a color film (allowing the walls to be convincingly painted with grue), while Tzameti is black and white (allowing the action and tension to take the stage).  Tzameti is a noir thriller, as I've mentioned...but Game is the most morbidly hysterical dark comedy I've EVER seen.

I've taken the liberty of enriching you all by uploading this roughly 8 minute slice of heaven to The Ossuary's video section and tagging it into this blog post below:

Things of note:

-There is always something hilarious about mundane conversation in a completely INSANE situation.  Watch it a second time if you like and just follow the dialogue.

-Even if you KNOW what's generally coming from this (hint:  look at the dvd it's on), the way it lulls you into a false sense of complacency for the first 2 minutes 40 seconds is pretty clever.  Don't fast forward though.  Let the suburbia envelope you.

-The old lady who's hard of hearing and a little slow:  Most.  hilarious.  old lady.  EVER.

-This short would NEVER work if the nonchalance of the characters wasn't maintained the WHOLE time.

-Watch for the little things:  tea reactions vs. blood reactions, the hard of hearing woman's blissfully idiotic smile after she complies with the rule change.

-"So my son finally shows up.  It's quarter to five...."  = classic.

So, in conclusion, watch Sunday's Game, love Sunday's Game, hell, tell your friends.  This short's so good, I feel it's my duty to rescue it from special feature obscurity.

This is Crypticpsych saying....I take mine with five sugars and whole milk.

Evening folks! It's....2:18AM on the east coast of the US and I'm home from my "Vacation". We'll come back to why that's in quotes in a moment. First, I wanna just mention that probably Tuesday or Wednesday, I have another, far more interesting entry lined up. But I needed to do this.

As I mentioned in the site report from Monstermania, I was planning the following weekend to head home to Louisiana (where I was born and lived for 15 years.) The plan was to go down for a family members 90th birthday and to see my favorite cousin (also a horror afficionado). This is an account of how that went. Thursday at 545, I hopped a flight out of Newark to Dallas, transfer to New Orleans. Flights werent terrible. No big problems with seatmates or anything. Got to the Louis Armstrong International Airport in New Orleans, and waited for the shuttle to take me to the hotel. And waited. Every other hotel shuttle came once before mine did. I guess I just have bad timing. There was free wi-fi at the hotel, but I mostly used it to follow Hurricane Gustav.

On Friday, the hurricane center didn't know where Gustav was going, and models were pointing everywhere from Texas to Florida. I spent my day...screwing plywood onto my grandparents windows with my uncle and father. Driving around, many stores were already boarded up. One, STUPIDLY, had broken down boxes and taped them to the inside of their windows (oh that'll work REAL good when the 70mph winds hit.) That night there was a minor family reunion where I met up people I hadn't seen in years. I then went outside and talked to my cousin via cellphone for an hour. I never got to see her on this trip...which is moderately distressing since I'm 80-90% sure she didn't evacuate, but I know that was what she wanted. We talked about movies (she liked 13: Game of Death as much as I did) and our lives. I ended up getting a 100% free copy of Dog Soldiers she'd loaned to my grandfather. When I went to bed, Gustav was a Category 1.

When I woke up, it was a Category 4. Saturday we visited my uncle the police officer. The mayor lost his mind, and told his people to "be scared" and "get their butts out". The airport decided to close sunday at 6. My flight was monday at 7. I got on one of the last flight's out. My hotel closed, but we were allowed to stay til the next morning while the national guard and fire folks arrived (nothing is more chilling than a national guard procession driving by in front of you in an average U.S. town). Evacuations were called for in all parishes. And I wouldn't be shocked if we see Katrina level devastation. (We may not, but I don't like the looks of this.)

Sunday, the streets were pretty deserted. We went to the airport which was one of the creepiest places I've ever been. First, we couldn't drop off the rental car as Budget had closed up. No shuttle either. We got it through the gate though because they allowed us too, and, after walking halfway to the terminal, a thrifty shuttle took us in. You couldn't be inside without ticket confirmation. No food or drink or anything was sold. M.R.E.'s were given out if people wanted them though I saw no one eating them. I was waiting at my terminal for 5 hours. Earlier flights going to other places came and went, people got bumped up. But I couldnt' be. So I was there at 330...when the outerband hit quickly. Rain poured down against the windows for a good 5-10 minutes. Short, I know, but I could see OUT that window 2 minutes before, now I could see nothing. I got out on a flight to Chicago O'Hare and connected over to Newark. (on the Chicago-Newark flight I had a spirited discussion of stephen king with a seatmate so that was nice). As we flew out toward O'Hare....and I looked out the window of the relatively empty flight....I've never seen a more empty looking major city than that.

And here I sit. To my knowledge the vast majority of my family is out, and those who aren't...they know what they are getting into. For me, this is nothing new. I lived there during Andrew and other storms from 1985-2000. But it doesn't make the general situation any easier.

I hope this isn't too much of a downer, but I got back early and thought people would like to know what it was like from someone who was down there and not a cnn or weather channel talking head. I'll have something more interesting and amusing later this week, but for now, I just thought I'd "educate" so to speak.

Hello. 

Before we begin, I should point out this will be different from the other site report.  For one, Fangoria is panel structured.  Monstermania has panels, but fewer of them.  Also, because of what happened Saturday, I missed all but one panel and all but one screening.  But that's ok, most were simple Q&As.  Also, Monstermania (rightfully in my opinion) tends to believe in free photos with celebs once you buy their autographs.  No tickets needed.  So lots of my freakish (heh) mug with famous people.  And, as a result of that difference, don't expect tremendous things like I did with each of the panels before.  While the signings were cool, I don't have paragraphs of material from them.  Still, as I've said before, I love this convention.  At it, the celebrities really seem to be glad to be there and the convention generally respects the fans. (with one notable exception.)  Oh, and I might mention things I got signed.  Hope no one minds.  So here we go.

FRIDAY

Remember kids.  Friday is always best for a convention like this.  Lines are short to non-existent in most cases, and the vendors have primo stock.  I NEVER had to wait more than about 5 minutes (but OH would I pay for that on Saturday).  Away we go:

NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET REUNION FOLKS FOR FRIDAY:

We have:  Penelope Sudrow(nightmare 3 "Jennifer Caulfield"..."Welcome To PRIME TIME BITCH!"), Brooke Theiss (Nightmare 4 "Debbie Stevens"...Roach Motel), Lisa Wilcox (Nightmares 4 and 5 "Alice Johnson"), Rodney Eastman (Nightmares 3 and 4 "Joey Crusel"...the topless women), and Lin Shaye (Original Nightmare (Teacher) and New Nightmare (Nurse with Pills)).  I also met up with Heather Langenkamp again.  But I already took a photo with her before so I sub that in here. (MY GOD...THAT HAIR....*cough*...never mind.)

So  Some of the people from the movie hadn't arrived yet (as you'll see on Saturday's group).  In general, all were awesome.  Sudrow asked for my email so she could get a copy of the picture.  Hasn't emailed yet, but I'll give it to her when she does.  Theiss, Wilcox, and Eastman were all genuinely nice.  Shaye was cool too.  Commented on her clothing chose.  Seems bright, fun, and cheerful doesnt it?  All were a bit surprised because the entire Nightmare group were in the room next to the Anchor Bay Booth...and Anchor Bay likes audience participation.  Over a microphone.  Thankfully I'd seen it before and was able to explain it to them.  Langenkamp was there for this and to promote her new directorial move in an upcoming anthology film called "Prank".  She, Ellie Cornell, and Danielle Harris (Halloweens 4 and 5) each directed a component.  I wanted to go to their panel early Saturday...but I was in a line.  Still, it sounds awesome.  I also inadvertenly minorly smudged an autograph I got from her.  She responded (awesomely) by putting her thumb in the smudge saying "now you've got my thumbprint".  Cooooool.

CORALINA CATTALDI-TASSONI:

Coralina Cattaldi-Tassoni of Demons 2, Opera, and most recently, Mother of Tears.  Super awesome.  I will come back to Mother of Tears in Saturday.  As for Ms. Cattaldi-Tassoni, she signed things for free if you bought an 8X10.  So i have an awesome Mother of Tears one with Argento doing his trademark, namely being the killer's hands.  Also, as a testament to her greatness, notice the open cell phone on the table.  When I walked up, she was on the phone.  I didn't mind and wouldve let her finish her call, but she actually put the person on hold and did my autograph.  Really nice.

JASON MEWES:

This is me...cheating again.  I've met Jason 3 times now, and I got a photo the first time, so I figured, why keep pestering for that.  Anyway.  Fact:  Apparently Jason's publicist doesn't know how to spell his name.  His poster (with photo of Jay) said he was (not kidding) "Jasen Mewes".  They had added red marker to turn the E into an O....sorta.  How do you mess that up, in THAT way?  He was super nice.  I was at the convention with my friends from Fangoria Con.  Jason had a hilarious conversation with one of them.  All in all, his usual awesome self.

KANE HODDER:

Somebody give me an acting gig.  lol.  This is actually the culmination of a mistake at my first con two years ago, Fango Secaucus 06.  At that con, Kane was there for Hatchet.  At the time, I didnt realize celebrities could charge (at that con, most I saw werent.)  So I saw a 25 dollar charge and said heck no.  Then.  Now, I'm not an idiot.  So here I am with Kane Hodder.  We got into a discussion about how Jason is similar to James Bond since so many people have played him (CJ Graham was next to him for example.)  He said he thought CJ did a great job as him and that each one brought their own thing.  He...also signed my copy of Hatchet with the word "Jason", but I think he was going on autopilot and its still cool either way.

A. MICHAEL BALDWIN:

Mike from Phantasm.  It goes well with Angus Scrimm's autograph from fango.  Great guy.

JOHN KASSIR:

You know those moments in life that you know are really important to you?  This is one of three from this con.  John Kassir, voice of The Cryptkeeper, Buster Bunny, and Santa's Little Helper.  (plus a stampede of wild animals Bart once unleashed.  Apparently you make a lemur sound by blending a Cat with a Raccoon.  The more you know.)  He slipped in and out of the Cryptkeeper voice FAR easier than I expected which was awesome.  For 25 dollars he'd also do your voicemail as Cryptkeeper or Buster Bunny.  We also talked about his acting episode of Tales from the Crypt, Oil's Well That Ends Well.  He talked about how much he liked doing it, how they incorporated the Cryptkeeper laugh into his character.  He also told me (I did not know this) that one reason they did that was that they thought it was one of the last eps.  But the show was picked up for another season shot in England.  Great guy.

JEFFREY COMBS:

This is the second one.  Jeffrey Combs, Dr. Herbert West (among many other things).  It occurs to me now, I really should have had him sign "The Black Cat" episode of Masters of Horror (as well as the Re-Animator he signed for me) so that i could continue my Masters quest.  Either way he was great.  We talked about his most recent role, that of the "Geek" in the Wizard of Gore remake.  He hasn't seen it yet.  I told him how much I liked it and asked him about his role and how they did it.  (As the geek, he bites off a rat's head and sticks his tongue in maggots and eats them)  He said the maggots were rice.  Also asked me if they'd CGI'd them so they looked like they were moving on his tongue.  I said, if they did it was barely noticeable as such, which is a compliment compared with a few bits of CGI in the film.  Also, while I was there, an employee brought him drinks from the bar.  Hilarious response when he tried it and saw its strength.  This is actually the second attempt.  The first photo was hilariously interfered with by.....

JAKE BUSEY:

Jake Busey of Starship Troopers and The Frighteners.  Jake was at the table next to Jeffrey and was messing with him (makes sense as they were both in Frighteners).  Their chemistry rivals that of Malcolm McDowell and Udo Kier at another con I went to who were sniping each other over their makeup and showing each other stuff they were signing. Awesome.  Also wrote "Got 1 More than Starkweather" on the dvd which is supercool (if you get the reference that is).

Not Pictured:  Derek Mears (new Jason from Friday remake).  Seemed super nice, but I just didnt have time;  The Lost Boys Reunion:  I'm sorry if you like the movie, but I've never seen it so I didnt spend the money on it.  My apologies if that disappoints you.  But speaking of the Two Coreys (who were there)

HOTEL BAR:

See?  Friends from Fangoria, Maura and Jessica (thanks again guys.)  It should be noted the next day I also ran into the folks from the Fangoria ice cream party.  lol.

Who else you ask?  Well that's where the Two Coreys come in.  The guys on my left and right are security guards.  The guy in front...is Corey Haim's assistant.  And thus, the one notable exception.  Corey Haim, from all I've heard, was not ideal.  He had a habit of leaving over and over to smoke packs of cigarettes, he was continually sipping his coffee cup (interpret as you will), he probably drove the other guy signing in the room nuts (more on that in a moment), and he lost it at one point.  See, Corey Feldman and his wife were elsewhere (smart).  But when someone mention in Haim's line that he had gotten her to sign her Playboy, Haim flipped out that she was there and signing, left the room, was seen gesturing pretty hardcore outside, then came back and did everything in his power to pretend to be happy etc.  Not Cool man.

I should also note, that this is far better than Fangoria's idea.  I just pay for the drink.  I don't pay extra on my ticket.  And after autographings close, the celebs filter through.  I saw the Nightmare reunion group, Coralina Cattaldi-Tassoni, the Lost Boys Reunion, Kane Hodder, and Derek Mears all passing through and ripe to have a photo taken if you were nice to them (i'd imagine).  Rather than stay to watch a midnight showing of Nightmare 3, I was tired and left sooo.....

SATURDAY:

THE LINE AND THE BURN:

Welcome to the first 5-6 hours of my Saturday, through which I missed the Prank Panel and Q&As for Jake Busey and Jason Mewes.  Where was I?  Outside.  In line.  I never even went inside.  Here we see the people who kept me sane in that line.  Not sure of the names of the two on the left.  They left when the wait crossed about 4 hours.  On the right (I think...) we have Heather and John.  Having people to discuss movies/remakes etc. with was invaluable in getting me through the wait.  Mostly the line moved at slow increments.  Took 2 hours to get shade (at least.  and me with no sunscreen, I got a minor burn).  I also didn't bring my book, even though it occured to me.  Heather was the smart one who did.  lol.  Also, a vendor came around at one point and doled out free comic books.  I got a copy of Ghost Rider.  Very smart of them.  The line stalled (while under the awning thank god) for an hour and a half while the person took a lunch we had been told about 45 minutes earlier (not his fault, he cares for his fans, thus he wanted to make sure they were all served).  Similarly, the previous night, Heather and John were shut out of autographs when the signing closed with 10 people in front of them.  (the person signing had been doing so for 5 hours, no breaks.  Definitely understand).  So.  Who was all this for?

ROBERT ENGLUND:

Now that's a photo.  I could've gotten my tongue out more though...I kinda look like I'm rolling my eyes.  Englund was awesome.  Highlights of his fans:  one person tried to get him to sign a Jason mask.  Don't know why, don't do it.  (he won't.  it's not his place.)  Another had him sign her arm.  She's going to get the signature tattooed on (AWESOME).

Corey Haim was also being annoying as all hell  (Englund was the guy I pitied for having to be in the room with him).  Random loud comments  when Robert would switch to Freddy voice (which is just as great as you'd think.)  You could tell Robert was really annoyed.  Englund also was selling various charms and actually, the backplate to the Freddy pinball machine (150 dollars).  I had him sign my box set along the side (he didn't like the effect because it meant they had to be together to read the signature...sorry about that mr. englund, just trying to be economical).  I also had him sign Dance of the Dead.  We got into a discussion about how I'd seen people bash it and didn't know why to which he wondered how people could bash Richard Matheson.  Awesome.  Oh. and...quoting:  "You got tongue, that's for the refrigerator!"

NIGHTMARE REUNION SATURDAY FOLKS:

We have:  Andras Jones (Rick Johnson of Nightmare 4...invisible karate), and Toy Newkirk (Sheila Kopecky of Nightmare 4..."wanna suck face?")  Not pictured:  Ken Sagoes(Roland Kincaid of Nightmare 3 and 4) who was there, but who I missed, timingwise.  They had both at the same table (space issues I'd wager).  Both were awesome.

TYLER MANE:

Tyler Mane, Michael Myers from Rob Zombie's Halloween.  Needed to have him sign an 8X10 Kristina Klebe signed at Fangoria.  Was super nice and liked what she wrote.  Note to myself though...if I'm going to try to mimic the person who I'm takin a photo with's hand gesture, I should probably LOOK WHAT HE'S DOING!  (IDIOT!)  After this, I headed upstairs for....

MOTHER OF TEARS SCREENING:

So.  My thoughts on Mother of Tears.  First of all, I should note, off the bat, that I have NOT seen Inferno.  It's in the mail and has been on backorder for over a month.  However from what I saw, that doesn't matter, as I still understood the plot.  Number Two:  See where that poster says "An Instant Cult Classic"?  Truer words have never been spoken.  Not kidding:  This movie contains:  a howler monkey of death, nudity, lesbians, gore, and a couple moments of ABHORRENT CGI.  The acting...particularly of Asia Argento...is pretty average.  And the script.  Oh.  My.  God.  The script...I have no idea what happened to it.  All that said....It's genuinely creepy, has fantastic gore, and, somehow, still has this feel of quality to it.  In other words, with all those problems, I LOVED THIS MOVIE.  Put another way, Troma once got a hold of Stendahl Syndrome and did a release of it (Blue Underground has the rights now).  Troma SHOULD have pushed to get this.  It would've fit right in.  A fun, popcorn, entertaining, cult movie.  Just don't go in expecting a life-changing experience.

NIGHTMARE PANEL:

Apologies for grain, but I was front-row, standing room and the light was dim (this is post photo-editing).  Left to right:  Lin Shaye, Rodney Eastman, Ken Sagoes, Lisa Wilcox, Andras Jones, Brooke Theiss, Toy Newkirk, Heather Langenkamp, Robert Englund.  Penelope Sudrow was there at some point I think, but I'm not sure.  I applaud Robert and Heather for steering questions and getting everyone involved since the crowd was asking them questions only pretty much.  Things you learn:  Kincaid and Joey would be an even match in a fight, Robert never understands how people claim there's misogyny in the Nightmare movies when a strong woman ALWAYS beats Freddy (I show that in my thesis), Robert's "suck face" with Newkirk was ruined on the first take when his Freddy dentures fell into her makeup prosthetic mouth, some of the scenes they filmed led them to nightmares later (like Heather having nightmares about Freddy's tongue wrapping around her head in new nightmare); Robert thinks that the original is scariest, Dream Warriors and Dream Master are best two-pack, and New Nightmare is his current favorite (it changes); Makeup is tough to do over such long periods, Robert has a lot of respect for Andrew Dice Clay, and lastly, Robert didn't know how he was going to do Freddy originally...until he channeled his jealousy of the looks of Heather and Johnny Depp into it and created Freddy, fittingly, out of it.  Great panel.  Overflowed out into the hallway and the head guy of the convention had them open the doors so the rest of the crowd could here.

SAW IV TRAP:

The knife trap from Saw IV.  Costs nothing to take a photo of it.  Costs 20 bucks to get in it for them to take a pic of you and put it in a stupid liner.  I like my choice more.

And now, my COSTUME OF THE CONVENTION:

This woman came dressed as Baroness from GI Joe.  Points for originality at a horror convention and the fact that runners up (Jason from Freddy vs. Jason complete with Freddy Head, and perfect Predator costume) didn't consider how hot it was and had to keep leaving and taking a breather.  And if anyone out there was going to say something about the fact that I chose a woman dressed in leather, I say, you must not have been at a horror convention before.  This is tame.  There were also schoolgirls running around among multiple other scantily clad women.  So give me more credit than that folks.  lol.

Up next:  PERICLES LEWNES:

Let me guess.  You're thinking "WHO IS PERICLES LEWNES?"  Pericles Lewnes has been mentioned on this site, here.  Yes, that's right folks, it's the 20th Anniversary of his Troma classic, Redneck Zombies.  Pericles was awesome, loved my shirt, and was also there promoting his new film, Loop.  I also mentioned our site to him and he gave me his business card.  I need to discuss something with Horror Czar about this which could be super cool *crosses fingers*.  Pericles was an unannounced guest fooooor.....

TROMA!!!!:

See, THIS is what Fangoria was missing.  I bought FAR too much at this table (don't ask just how much) and I still didnt' get all I wanted.  If they show at Chiller in Parsippany in October, I'm gonna nab copies of Special Needs and Dracula v. Frankenstein.  They were great to all comers.  This is the abbreviated version of their table.  Lloyd had the big stuff with him in Toronto at Rue Morgue's Festival of Fear.  It was, and is still, always a highlight of the show for me, seeing that the table is still there.

And with that, I bid you farewell.  It's 1151PM here on the east coast of the US and I am VERY tired.  Spent all night uploading photos, etc.  Had a lot of fun though doing this.  It was far easier than putting them on facebook, which I did first.  I really need to put away everything I bought.  I'll also be heading out of town Thursday night through Monday afternoon (going home home to New Orleans for the first time in four years (i was born and lived there 15 years).  Shouldnt cause problems though (liveblog's off for a couple weeks.  Dem and Republican Conventions.)  I will also be site reporting again in October for Chiller in Parsippany.

Until next time, this is Crypticpsych saying:  Always wear sunscreen.  And don't...do...smack.

Whilst I nurse this sunburn (more on that in a site report from the convention later this week), It's time for another piece of my epic.  Today we will be finishing off the 1960s by discussing Roman Polanski's classic Rosemary's Baby.  Cited works today include the film itself (because I'm paraphrasing the plot to discuss this properly), Gregory A. Waller's Introduction to American Horrors:  Essays on the Modern American Horror Film, Virginia Wright Wexman's "The Trauma of Infancy in Roman Polanski's Rosemary's Baby" from that book, Carol J. Clover's Men, Women, and Chainsaws:  Gender in the Modern Horror Film, and Reynold Humphries's The American Horror Film:  An Introduction.

     The other movie of the 1960s that tends to emphasize a weak female protagonist, though through somewhat different circumstances, is Roman Polanski's Rosemary's Baby. In fact, the movie has even been considered, in much the same way as Psycho, as a crucial component of the beginning of the modern era of American horror films. (Waller 2) Regarding what specifically tends to be cited as the reasons for Rosemary's Baby's impact, the movie is often noted for Polanski's ability to make a movie with a degree of nebulousness in its main plotline separate from that seen in the story it was based on. "Though Polanski's screenplay stays close to Levin's original story, the movie maximizes the ambiguity between paranoid projection and real events that the novel repeatedly strives to resolve."(Wexman 37) Specifically what is being discussed most often is the degree to which the viewer of the movie, throughout almost the entire film, is made unsure of just how much of the events befalling Rosemary are actually happening in reality and how much of them are misinformed overreaction or imagination. While some analysts have claimed that Polanski made the answer abundantly obvious by the revelation of the coven at the movie's conclusion, the superimposing of an inhuman face over Rosemary's body, and filmic techniques meant to imply imprisonment and helplessness, the fact that Polanski never actually shows the child in the movie still leaves the question slightly open-ended. (36-7) In fact, it is this ambiguity that can show just how similar Rosemary really is to the aforementioned weak female lead, Marion in Psycho.
      Upon further analysis, while Rosemary is able to survive the entire movie, unlike Marion, it is interesting to note that, throughout the movie, she is unable to gain control of her situation, no matter what she attempts. She becomes a quintessential victim of her circumstances, her surroundings, her naiveté and the wants and desires of others. In the beginning of the movie, Rosemary willingly buys the fateful apartment with her husband Guy, even after discovering the building's dark, bloody history from her former landlord Hutch. She also, at least at first, allows herself to be sucked into a friendship with her elderly next-door neighbors, Roman and Minnie Castavet, initially not questioning her husband's closeness with Roman or strange occurrences relating to gifts she receives from them. She permits them to convince her to change her obstetrician from one she was recommended by a friend to one whom they endorse and who will prescribe treatments heavily influenced by Minnie's strange herbs. Also, on the night of conception itself, Rosemary's downfall is that she allows herself to be incapacitated, whether by tainted chocolate mousse or too much alcohol, and is thus totally unable to control and fend off her husband's sexual advances and desires. She was, in a manner of speaking, unwillingly impregnated: "When Guy tells Rosemary that he ‘didn't want to miss baby night,' he acknowledges not just an act of ‘necrophile' penetration, as he puts it the morning after, but impregnation as well."(Clover 80)
     As the movie continues, Rosemary becomes more and more suspicious of her husband and her neighbors. However, she still shows herself to be immensely weak in her convictions at multiple points over the story, most memorable of these being when she complains of both the raw meat she has begun to find herself eating and the excruciating pain she has been experiencing for the first few months of her pregnancy which Dr. Sapirstein has been ignoring. When the pain suddenly goes away as soon as it reaches its zenith, Rosemary returns to trusting Sapirstein and taking the Castavets' strange brew of herbs, suppressing the fears she once expressed. She also, to a degree, trusts her husband after she discovers he does not have a mark on his shoulders that would show he belonged to the coven. This particular example of Rosemary's naïveté is seriously egregious in that it goes against a slowly increasing amount of evidence that her husband may be untrustworthy, including his implication in the tragedies that befell a fellow actor and Hutch and his apparent unwillingness to listen to his wife's concerns regarding the Castavets.
     In the movie's final scenes, one sees Rosemary attempting everything in her power to determine the truth about her pregnancy or prevent the birth. She is thwarted in each attempt to either gain information or expose the coven, however. She attempts to determine the Castavets' secrets through research, yet her husband throws away her book when he figures out what she is doing. She tries to revisit Sapirstein to tell of her suspicions, only to realize he may be one of the Castavets' allies. She returns to her prior obstetrician, Dr. Hill, only to be betrayed by him to her husband and Sapirstein out of disbelief rather than allegiance. Finally, she attempts to run from Saperstein and Guy en route to the apartment, barricading herself inside the building. This fails as well when Guy is able to easily get through the locks with the doctor, as it is also his apartment, and sedate his wife. Ultimately, Rosemary is momentarily fooled into thinking she has had a miscarriage, discovers the truth when acting upon suspicions brought about by hearing a crying baby, and determines the extent of the coven's influences. Overall, the clearest proof of her victim role, her helplessness, and her general weakness is seen in the fact that she cannot suppress her maternal instincts and appears to agree to raise what is presumed to be the devil's child as her own. Thus, the movie ends on a note of subjugation and control in which the elders, Rosemary's doctor, and Rosemary's husband are able to utilize Rosemary's femininity and sexuality for their own gains. As put by Reynold Humphries in The American Horror Film: An Introduction:
"[...] what we are seeing is a persecuted young woman accepting the tasks of the dutiful mother and their attendant ideology. [...]For during the ‘rape' sequence the alternating shots of Guy and of Satan having sex with Rosemary insist on the piercing eyes of both: whether one accepts the supernatural reading or prefers a rational one, Rosemary will be under constant surveillance"(88-9).

Seeing as I'm currently fasting for blood work in the morning (that blood drive thing made me look at some other odd things in my life like random dizzy spells, leading me to consider the possibility that I am possibly maybe developing slight hypertension or diabetes), I'm watching the Dolphins episode of Penn and Teller:  BS (thank god for free on demand samplers), and I haven't done this in a while, IT'S TIME FOR PART THREE!  Today we will be attempting to prove that the characters of Marion and Lila in Psycho were not earthshattering changes as some might have you believe.    Sources cited today are: Psycho itself (though not physically, I am paraphrasing plot points here), the "Posters and Psycho Ads" special feature on the Psycho Collector's Edition dvd from 1998, Tony Williams's essay "Trying to Survive on the Darker Side:  1980s Family Horror" from the literary criticism collection The Dread of Difference:  Gender and the Horror Film, and Carol J. Clover's classic book Men, Women, and Chainsaws.  Of particular note in this section:  A)I have no idea how I got a B+ on this because GOD did this have spelling and grammar errors before I edited it for this, B)This section contains the first instance of me purposely rubbing my advisor's face in my use of Demon Knight later on, and C)I'm VERY thankful for that Carol Clover quote at the end.  Enjoy!  Next time:  Rosemary's Baby.

     Over the course of the history of the horror film, the role of female characters in horror movies has slowly evolved from supporting, weak, powerless roles in some "creature features" to women who are strong, self-sustaining, powerful fighters that attempt to survive at all costs. This change did not occur all at once. Rather it has happened in stages that one can see by examining movies released during each decade from the 1960s on that were either popular or which strikingly showed the trend of the decade in the evolution of the feminine. While many of the movies that will be discussed are of high critical acclaim and are beloved by a sizeable audience, it is sometimes the cult film that can prove the progression equally well. It is for this reason that, while films like Rosemary's Baby, Carrie, and The Silence of the Lambs should rightly be discussed here, so as well should the "slasher" film milestones some consider to have been detrimental to the genre due to the deluge of sequels they spawned. Even lesser known, sometimes critically dismissed, offbeat movies such as Tales from the Crypt Presents: Demon Knight deserve some credit in the progression due to how certain characters in them are able to show depth, emotion, and strength heretofore unseen in film and demonstrate the overall progression of female characters in general.
     It is important to note that the 1960s can be chosen as the first dividing decade due to a small change seen in two movies of the decade. The first film that features this is Psycho, though not because women exhibited different characteristics in this movie than they had previously in any way, shape, or form. In fact, the main difference between the female protagonist and her sister, Marion and Lila respectively, and the women of the movies that preceded them is that Marion is the main character focused on in the first act of the film. It is her story and the consequences of her actions that allow the plot to move forward and the movie's events to occur. That is not to say that the movie was marketed in that way, though, as Anthony Perkins's role as Bates was top-billed both in the trailer and on the movie posters and lobby cards, compared to Janet Leigh's which was last in all the marketing materials. ("Posters and Psycho Ads")
     Marion is the character whom the action revolves around from the beginning of the film and is the reason for the developments that occur as the movie goes on. However, to claim that she acts differently because of this is patently false. The opening sequence of the movie shows her in a motel room with her lover, having sex with him and discussing the possibility of marrying him. During this sequence, Marion appears to be quite uncomfortable with the secretive circumstances with which she must meet with her lover and acts so as to bring some degree of respectability and commitment into their relationship. She then goes to her job (a secretary-like position). At her job she is presented with $40,000 cash as part of a real-estate job and is supposed to deposit it in a safe-deposit box. Instead, she steals the money and leaves town in an attempt to find both herself and her lover. Along the way, she lies to a policeman, changes cars, and ends up at the Bates Motel after leaving behind the suspicious policeman at a used car lot. Once there, after a private dinner with Norman, Marion returns to her room where she is stabbed. Throughout this sequence of events, Marion acts of her own free will, attempts to be somewhat self-sufficient for the time period, and is, as a result, dead halfway through the movie. In order for her death to be avenged, it takes her lover, Sam, and Lila to hunt Norman down and discover his secret, with Sam specifically being the one to knock Norman out, rescuing Lila from mortal peril in the process.
     Thus, in general, the female roles of Marion and Lila represent a small step forward rather than a massive change. The characters in the film are far more similar to the expected role of the female in horror to that point, particularly Lila who only survives the movie because of Sam's protection. (Williams 170) Marion falls less into this category because she attempts to express her femininity and exercise her rights. However, she is still constrained by societal roles as seen through her job as a secretary and the questions she is asked by the police officer who appears to find it very suspicious that a woman driving alone would be in such a rush. (He asks her multiple times if anything is wrong and also follows her down the road to her next destinations.) She is also helpless in that she is taken by surprise by Norman and is thus powerless to stop herself from being stabbed to death. In general, Psycho is a turning point in the history of horror movies in that it redefined the way movies are marketed and the way in which directors and actors instigate fear in audiences. However, when the roles of the two primary women are examined, it is seen that the development of the feminine had not yet fully begun. Rather, Psycho was simply one of the first popular horror movies to have a woman in a protagonist role, even though she was still just as weak as women in horror movies had been before. Overall, while some of its plot elements were quite derivative, it was how they were put together and portrayed by the actors that made the movie such a touchstone. As Carol J. Clover puts it while describing Psycho in her book Men, Women, and Chainsaws:
"Its elements are familiar: the killer is the psychotic product of a sick family, but still recognizably human; the victim is a beautiful, sexually active woman; the location is not-home, at a Terrible Place; the weapon is something other than a gun; the attack is registered from the victim's point of view and comes with shocking suddenness. None of these features is original, but the unprecedented success of Hitchcock's particular formulation, above all the sexualization of both motive and action, prompted a flood of imitations and variations" (23-4, underlining mine).

Yeah.....that title sounds so much better when they do it. 

So yeah, as I previously blogged, I rented six movies last Monday and said I would give my quick thoughts later (might do full reviews of some at some other point way later but this will do for now.)  After not watching any of them until Saturday I decided to watch the six pretty much in a row.  Remember kids, I'm a trained professional.  Sorta.  So now here are my thoughts in the order that I watched them.  While the order was done pretty much at random, I should note that this basically is the order I wouldve gone for:

1)  Funny Games (remake) (2007)-

Rating:  7 Callaway Drivers out of 10

I wanted to say great things about Funny Games, I really did.  And its a good movie with a pretty captivating storyline.  But it suffers for certain reasons.  For one, like Hard Candy (which I like), the movie presents your main family as people who you never really identify with.  They're uppercrust snobs basically, who you have a bit of a rough time wanting to see survive since they seem like theyd be phony around you and stab you in the back when you aren't looking.  Similarly, the villains seem kinda exactly like the people they're going after:  rich, upper class snobs as seen in their attire.  So you don't know why their doing it and can't really identify with them either.  Thatd be ok if, like in Hard Candy, the story kept rolling without a slow patch and the viewer was continually along for the ride and not kept in tension.  But unfortunately, after a "misunderstanding" with a shotgun, the villains leave their victims for a while and you the viewer are treated to roughly 10-15 minutes of them trying to free themselves and dry their phone and escape.  The length kills that, particularly when about 3 minutes of it is just Naomi Watts's character trying to stand up slowly and remove her duct tape and shut off the tv.

I should note though that the movie does get 7 drivers because the villains are still very good in the way they toy with their victims.  Also, the breaking of the fourth wall that happens four times over the course of this movie, is something I actually enjoyed, stylistically speaking.  Overall, the movie has an engaging plot but cant maintain its pace around the middle.  It's actors are ones you dont particularly care survive or not even though it should be noted they give good performances.  And I should mention, I actually predicted the ending sequence right down to the final shot, which is not necessarily a good thing.  It's worth a rent at the least, but I wouldnt buy it both for the reasons I've mentioned and because the dvd is as bare bones as bare bones gets.  There is literally NOTHING on it.  Overall, its above average, but underwhelming for me(I may have set the bar too high for it so your mileage may vary).  Moving on to Saturday's second film:

2)  ZA:  Zombies Anonymous (AKA Last Rites of the Dead)(released on dvd 2008, made in 2006)-

Rating:  9.5 Jars of Look Alive Face Cream out of 10

Of the 6 movies I rented that day, this was the only one I did not go in thinking about.  I didn't even know about this movie.  I'd never even HEARD of it.  But when the title is that interesting and the synopsis grabs you like this one's did, I couldnt resist.  And I am damn glad I did.  This movie is outstanding.  A review I read after I'd seen it summed it up perfectly:  It's not a zombie movie, it's a movie about zombies.  It's a blend of a dark comedy, a drama, a horror movie, a splatter flick, and an action movie.  The movie is very well shot for an indie film...hell it's better shot than some mainstream ones.  The gore is GENERALLY convincing (and when it isn't well remember, it's an indie flick).  The plot pours in almost Romeroan levels of social commentary.  You could see it as musings on terrorism and guerilla warfare, a look at racism, and indictment of religion, all in one.  Not to mention the acting is solid throughout.  I cannot say enough good things about this movie.

So why didnt I give it 10 out of 10 you ask?  Because the movie does have one flaw.  Whoever lined it up for release made a series of very bad cuts.  You can find the uncut sequences on youtube if you look hard enough, but as it is, one character cuts her hair after a certain event occurs and dyes it.  This isnt shown, she just appears that way.  Thus, if you don't know it's coming, you might be lost for about the last third of the movie.  Also, some of the violent bits were excised unfortunately, but it should be noted that what remains is spectacularly bloody in and of itself, so I personally didnt' miss it.  However, in general, both of those points are small potatoes considering how pleasant a surprise and how awesome this movie is.  I recommend it to everyone on every level.  It was a great way to end Saturday.  Now:  Sunday's foursome began with:

3)  The Ruins (2008)-

Rating:  8 Ringing Cellphones out of 10

How ironic that I'm going to begin this review of a movie that I liked a lot by saying something I'm going to come back to in another part of this:  I'm sick and tired of these damn movies that pretend every teenager is from Laguna Beach or The Hills or some other show filled with vapid, dumbass, rocks-for-brains partyhound teenagers.  This movie lost a star and a half at the very start for having such thoroughly unlikeable leads (with the exception of Mathias who I loved).  I mean, I KNOW Jena Malone could act better than that.  Granted, by the end of the movie, she and the rest proved that point quite well which is why it's still an 8.  Once I got past that opening bit, I was captivated by the atmosphere and the outstanding gore effects, not to mention the plot twists (like the flowers).  I have a lot of respect for a movie that actually produces a genuinely frightening atmosphere AND gets a wide release these days.  I'm probably being unnecessarily harsh on it, because it is very good, but those damn actors really got me in the wrong mood from the start.

That, and the other lost half-star I blame on the people who released it.  Are we that jaded we can't have a nihilistic ending anymore?  The dvd is made with an alternate ending, has another alternate ending, and has the original theatrical ending.  Two of the three end on a downbeat in a way.  Through a tiny change, one of them doesnt.  Guess which one they used in theatrical release.  We CAN handle a dark ending studio people.  Geez.  Overall, though, definitely worth seeing if you can get past the eyesplittingly whiny characters early on so that they develop more as the film progresses.  Next:

4)  13:  Game of Death (released in 2006, dvd in 2008)-

Rating:  10 Twisted Challenges out of 10

If someone gave you the chance to win tons of money, what would you do to get it?  How far would you go?  This Thai(read:  subtitled) import asks that question of a down-his-luck salesman and takes you along for every second of the ethically questionable and morally challenging ride.  This film has it all.  The challenges are twisted, sometimes in ingenious ways, the movie is filled with a dark twisted humor (the chair beating in one challenge is darkly hysterical), the actors are all believable, and the overall ending caught me completely by surprise. 

When I originally said this and the next film were on the rental list, I said that I hoped they weren't just saw clones.  This one isn't by any means.  This film is more of an adrenaline fueled thriller with inklings of films like Shoot 'Em Up and Wanted in it.  Is it strictly horror?  No, it's definitely more thriller than horror.  However, it's deeply engaging, totally unforgettable, and a wild ride.  An outstanding accomplishment.  Next:  was the other a Saw clone?

5)  Steel Trap (released in 2007, dvd in 2008)-

Rating:  6 Nursery Rhymes out of 10

Oh....Steel Trap.  Ohhhhh boy...I'm torn on how to describe my feelings for it.  First things first...see that case?  Looks great doesnt it?  Yeah don't expect to see it.  Or almost anything like it.  Number 2:  Following is the word for word synopsis on the back of the case:  "A New Year's bash in an abandoned high-rise building turns into a grisly bloodbath when five guests receive a mysterious text invite to a VIP party on the 27th floor.  Joined by two crashers, the strangers soon realize they're trapped, and the only way out is through the twisted clues of a psychopath.  The catch?  Each game leads to one of their own gruesome deaths.  With a series of shocking twists, Steel Trap holds you in its grip all the way to its mind-blowing ending."  Now TELL ME that's not Saw/Saw 2.

Well actually....it isn't.  They try to hook you in with that.  If you notice, the cover has a distinctly Saw feel (note the saw blades).  It's actually a slasher film more than it is a Saw movie.  The challenges never really lead directly to someone's death, and the movie is more a scavenger hunt than a death trap type situation.  Not only that:  the acting....is unbelievably hammy and bad.  On a hilarious level.  You will be laughing at almost every character by the time the movie is over.  The script is equally hysterical, switching between insanely dumb dialogue, snarky one-liners, and random statements of the obvious.

Why you may ask, did I give it a 6 then?  I liked it actually.  Because its so unbelievably hysterical.  It's very much one of those "you people are so stupid" movies.  I also like the look of the killer, even though he's underdeveloped and underused.  Also, the use of twisted nursery rhymes to lead people around was amusing, as was murders themed off of little nameplates the victims were given early on.  But the big thing that saved it from a 5 or less was the ending.  Is it mind-blowing?  No.  Did it come out of left field? Hell yes.  But it was also one of the most surreal, hilarious, ways of revealing the ending I've ever seen.  As a whole, this movie gets a 6 because I love this movie.  And I KNOW I shouldn't.  And now.....we come to....*sigh*....

6)  April Fool's Day (remake) (direct to dvd 2008)-

Rating:  2.5 Pranks out of 10

Hollywood rule no. 1:  If you can't outright lie about what the movie is on the cover (see above), the other way to sell some direct to dvd movies is to throw a pair of....assets...on the cover.  See that thing that says "unrated"?  Yeah, ignore that.  It's direct-to-dvd.  It's ALL unrated.  Now then.  I wanted to hate this movie on every level.  Unfortunately I couldnt.  Not on EVERY level.  But damn close.  First off:  That thing I mentioned about the Hills-ified horror movie in The Ruins?  This movie keeps that the whole time.  Only one of the principles comes close to giving a good performance.  Terrible and thoroughly unlikeable actors.  Second:  If you're gonna remake an 80s slasher classic, dont do this:

This is the original cover art/poster art of the classic original.  If you ever have a chance, take a look at the picture on the dvd of the remake (the disc itself I mean).  It's basically an exact replica of this shot, minus the noose.  The shot is from behind, girl's holding a knife, and the rest of the characters are toasting.  Theres a fine line between remake and ripoff.  And that crosses it, turns around and pees on it.  Also, whether youve seen the original or not, the plot basically walks you by the hand to the thoroughly unsurprising (as a result) end (and cribs pretty danged liberally from I Know What You Did Last Summer to do that, oddly).  The music is also bizarre:  you cant tell if they're just using bad, out of place music or paying homage to the 80s (I HIGHLY doubt that option).

I couldve given it 1 instead of 2.5.  But:  Scout Taylor-Compton is pretty good in this actually as Torrance.  Thats worth a star.  Also, the way that the movie revamped the old twist itself in that they updated how it was all done did deserve a star.....until they went and wrecked it with a double twist (almost triple twist really).  So I gave that a half-star instead.  Thus a VERY generous 2.5 stars out of 10.  Do not see this movie.  3 minutes and 27 seconds in, I wanted to throw the dvd out of the player.  I didnt.  I'm still not sure whether I should have or not.

And thats all folks.  I dunno when I'll do something like this again, but if I do, youll be the first to know.

Until next time, please remember:  Friends don't let friends do direct-to-dvd remakes.

Hello and welcome to everyone's favorite soon-to-be on Olympic hiatus, overprotective parent bashing play-by-play tv show review:

I'm gonna make this part short:  First, because, once again, Fear Itself is going on hiatus (Olympics this time), this will be the last liveblog til its return post-Olympics.  Second, if you're curious how I feel about those six movies I mentioned in a blog a few days ago, I haven't watched any yet.  Been busy.  Third, I havent seen much response on other sites about Community.  One thing I did see though, bashed it's lack of gore.  If you're so jaded in horror that you NEED gore to elicit a response, PLEEEASE get out more.

Oh I think I'm forgetting something....oh yeah....this.  YEP. AGAIN.  THIRD TIME.  This time New Year's Day was the worst show of the week.  I'm going to come out and say it.  Their description of the ep was more graphic than the ep itself.  Plus, apparently according to them, zombies don't belong on network tv.  Oh...and BLOOD doesn't either.  They BASHED that blood was on the walls.  ITS A HORROR SHOW YOU IDIOTS.  STOP ASKING IT TO BE SOMETHING IT ISNT.  Oh and, btw, it took them 7 EPISODES to actually fully rate it as not suitable for children.  Seriously, get a freaking life.

See that?  I wouldnt be able to get so angry if all my red blood cells werent replenished.    And on that note, off we go:

0958PM:  A) Thank god Last Comic Standing is ending, B) I want the olympics to be here then over, C) Tonight it's Skin and Bones by Larry Fessenden, director of indie hit The Last Winter.

1002PM:  This is the western-y one.  And this episode also has been pretty danged boring so far.

1003PM:  So we went with the "non-scary" open, eh?  I think it worked better last week.

1005PM:  Interesting.  I have no thoughts on these ads.  I mean, I already bashed that verizon ad last week, and the others werent particularly great.

1006PM:  OW OW OW OW OW.  WHY WHY WHY AM I SEEING A TRAILER FOR SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS 2?  WRONG AUDIENCE PEOPLE.

1007PM:  Ok, I understand he looked pretty gnarly.  Looks a bit like Ron Perlman actually.  Which he isnt but which is interesting since Perlman was in The Last Winter.

1009PM:  "Doug Jones"?  Is that the Doug Jones I think it is?  Are we in the presence of Abe Sapien?

1010PM:  Two kinda slow building eps in a row isnt necessarily a good idea.......and where the hell's any music whatsoever?

1011PM:  IT IS DOUG JONES!  AWESOME!

1012PM:  Niiiiiice.

1014PM:  Really really dont care about the olympics and all its commercialization.

1014PM 2:  I'm not sure if Pineapple Express is going to be amazingly hilarious or amazingly awful.

1016PM:  The opening ceremonies are the ONLY thing I'm gonna watch prolly related to the Olympics

1018PM:  Theres something really messed up about only seeing Doug Jones's head.

1019PM:  The head's almost animatronic geez.

1020PM:  I'm getting the strange feeling that this episode will have precisely one good thing in it.  Doug Jones.  He's sure been great thus far.  But not much else has.

1021PM:  Really?  You're referencing the wendigo?  How ironic.  Since FESSENDEN DIRECTED A MOVIE CALLED THAT.

1022PM:  Eddie the Indian's not terrible either, I should note that.

1023PM:  The fingertips are a very nice touch, makeup wise.

1024PM:  All right, we're halfway in and this isnt remotely exciting.  Doug Jones is basiclaly the ONLY worthwhile thing in this.

1025PM:  These moments of vigor are great, but they are way way too few and far between for such a length of show.

1026PM:  Apparently we did not learn from Darren Lynn the lessons about using the damn quick cuts eh?  Just once or twice or three times isnt so awful though.  Brings The Ring to mind.

1027PM:  Mirrors will be very good.  And probably get a great release.  That's my thought.  Midnight Meat Train on the other hand, if you believe the horror sites, has been unjustly banished to BUDGET THEATERS.  They're like purposely shooting a perfectly good movie in the foot and its just depressing.  If you can find it, it comes out tomorrow.

1031PM:  I'm beginning to get touches of Poltergeist here.  Is it just me?  That shot of everyone standing around looking up reminded me of it and the hunt for the ghosts and the cleansing of the house.

1032PM:  Eddie Bear might as well be wearing a freaking target on his chest.

1032PM 2:  Oh sure, just like Spooked, halfway in we decide to amp everything up.

1033PM:  These kids...are so damned annoying.

1034PM:  Nice angle there.  That bullhorn shadow shot.

1035PM:  Wow.  that was....ow......the acting right there was so bad it actually hurt....was his arm just separated from his body?  If so, that was nice.

1037PM:  Well I get the meaning of the title....but it is still a bit odd.

1038PM:  Doug Jones really is great for this role.  I mean the man's pretty damned skinny to begin with.

1039PM:  That music was so out of place for a second.  Again, nice quick character switch again.

1039PM 2:  Commercial placement's bothering me.  Mostly because the episode, with very few exceptions, has been so boring that I don't know where would be a good place to put them.

1040PM:  Harold and Kumar 2 was quite good.  But still a step below the original though for me.  But that's just me.  Just throwing it out there.

1041PM:  Hmm.  Rosie Perez and Seth Mcfarlane on one Tonight Show.  Anyone who's seen the ep of Family Guy about Y2K knows that might be interesting.

1042PM:  Well at least I'm not alone on this.  Apparently, Brendan Fraser is less enthusiastic/excited about his own damn movie than I am.

1045PM:  3, 2, 1.........and speaking of Helena, I know I've seen her in something else too.

1045PM 2:  And a brilliant line (I've brought dinner!) gets ruined by a terrible scream.

1046PM:  Doug Jones rules this episode.  But even he cant carry this alllll alone.

1046PM 2:  This is some of the best dialogue I've ever seen.  Specifically Doug Jones, and only Doug.

1047PM:  A) Still more great Doug Jones lines, and B)  Violence against women is kinda new in the series.  PTC'll probably get their panties in a bunch over this too.  God I wish someone would just stop them.

1048PM:  Niiiiiiice.  Yeah, thisll prolly get called out as worst on tv in a couple weeks too.  Annd the shots of the chunks clinched it.

1049PM:  OK THAT WAS A TERRIBLE COMMERCIAL PLACE.  I was just getting more into it because it was ALL JONES basically, and you gotta kill the tension.

1051PM:  Wow.  a KY commercial.  On network TV.  The times they are a-changin.

1052PM:  You really get the sense they just cut that scene right in half with that ad.  So not a good idea.

1053PM:  Hmm....the way I'm getting a domestic dispute/dysfunctionality vibe here is kinda nice.

1053PM 2:  JUST LOAD THE DAMN GUN.

1054PM:  OK, I can't totally understand him....but the thing dangling out of his mouth was nice.

1055PM:  Oh boy...violence against children.....he looks like Rupert Grint.  So apparently Ron Weasley-esque boy's gonna die now?

1057PM:  WHAT IS RULE ONE.  DONT LEAVE THE GUY UNLESS YOU KNOW HE'S DEAD.

1058PM:  SURPRISE!  IT'S A HAPPY ENDING!  WHAT A TWIST!

And so my final thoughts:  If Doug Jones was not playing the monster in this, this would probably have been the worst episode so far.  If the episode hadnt had that amazing kitchen sequence, this would probably have been the worst episode so far.  As it has both, I rank it at the same level or slightly ahead of Spooked, but definitely a large step back.  Tension was WAY too slowly built up to be effective.  Episodes have issues when I'm not pulled in by the middle of an hour show.  Again, like Spooked, maybe the possible uncut dvd release will be better.  As it is, it's worth seeing for an amazing performance by Doug Jones, but otherwise a definite low point.

And so until next time, this is Crypticpsych saying....did I mention I frigging hate the Olympics?

NOTE:  This week's liveblog is dedicated to the memory of David J. DeRosa, the father of a friend of mine who died on Friday, July 25.  He was a man I truly respected, whose sense of humor I shared, and who seemed to me to be a great father to his son.  He will be missed.

So you think you had a strange Monday?  Top this:

I woke up a touch late today so I had no time for breakfast, just headed to the lab.  I forgot that today was the blood drive, so I ran down and filled out the paperwork.  Had a cup of coffee (milk and five sugars.  always.)  Told them this, they told me i'd have to eat first.  I had a cup of orange juice, and gave blood.  He couldnt find my vein on my right arm.  Then my left.  Then my right, where he finally found it.  I told him I wasn't going to look away because "I write for a horror website."  lol.  I didn't watch it puncture me, but that was a way bigger needle than I thought.  I plugged the site ot him, talked about a couple movies.  Then I went and had a donut, a kudos bar, and a cup of cran-raspberry.  Went back to work.  Did things with my left arm, like lifted a full 5 gallon drum of junk oil for removal.  Did a filtration. Then I tried to pour chemical into a bottle...using my right arm.  Pain.  Sat down, started to sweat.  Went and got water, went to the bathroom, headed back to the lab.  Getting progressively more lightheaded as I walk, and barely make it back.  I proceed to sweat profusely, breathe heavily.  First aid gets there, tells me i'm white as a sheet.  I'm freaking miserable.  They're trying to get my pulse and blood pressure.  They can't (remember the vein problems?).  Finally, over the next 20 minutes, I return to normal.  Drive to Burger King, get a triple, spend the rest of the day relaxing (so to speak.)  So yeah.  Almost passed out in the middle of a chemical lab today.  That's new eh?

On the plus side though, that trip to Burger King yielded more than just a tasty burger (sorta. It's fast food, I work with what I can get.).  I gave a dollar to The Jimmy Fund there.  Got a scratch off with a "Buy one get one" for blockbuster.  So that's where I went after work.  And now I'm gonna be watching over the next few days (besides previously viewed dvds of DOA:  Dead or Alive and The Messengers at 3.99 a pop):

THE GOOD:

The Ruins

Funny Games

THE WILD CARDS:

Steel Trap

13: Game of Death (i'm hoping both of those are better than simple saw clones.)

ZA:  Zombies Anonymous (loooooks funny.......)

And THE WHY WHY WHY WHY WHYS:

April Fool's Day REMAKE!  (Yes, I shall take the punishment of this direct to dvd travesty for the betterment of Ossuary kind.)

I'll probably mention my feelings on these 6 after I've watched them.  But for now, I'm gonna lie down and continue to replenish blood cells.  lol.  Happy Haunting.

And now part 2.  In which I admit that Psycho is worthy of general praise for being an overall classic and show how.  In the next part, I'll break down why, while it may be a classic, its far LESS original than most people might think in some areas.  Cited in this run:  AFI's 100 Years...100 Movies, AFI's 100 Years...100 Thrills, and Ransom Riggs's article in Mental Floss Magazine (Nov-Dec 2006)"Masterpieces:  Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho".  Enjoy......

The 1960s: Weak Female Protagonists
To claim that Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho is unoriginal and uninspired is just as large a fallacy as claiming it is the only line that defined all movies that followed it. It is perfectly logical to present the argument that Psycho is a classic of horror in its own right. After all, a movie like Psycho is not dubbed the 18th best overall movie and most thrilling movie of the last 100 years by the American Film Institute for no reason.(AFI's 100Years...100 Movies, AFI's 100 Years...100 Thrills) Psycho is best known for having one of the most effective "twist endings" in the history of film. It's also distinctive because it is one of the first mainstream horror movies to be promoted as having a female protagonist. However, what may be Psycho and Hitchcock's greatest legacy is the ability of the film and its director to create the maximum tension and suspense in the viewing public through techniques that would become horror staples, particularly in the slasher genre some claim it fostered. In particular, analysts examine the infamous 45 second shower scene as proof of this. Using a soundtrack meant to evoke the action of stabbing a victim, foreshadowing by showing a shadow entering the bathroom during the protagonist's shower, and camera angles throughout the montage showing the killer's, victim's, and "knife's" perspectives; Hitchcock is able to "create the impression of nudity and violence without actually showing a breast, a buttock, or a knife puncturing skin" (Riggs 25). To this day, the sequence is seen as one of the most effective and scariest sequences in the history of the genre.

While the "shower scene" is memorable, it alone does not make Psycho compelling. Without effective character development, cinematography, and direction, the movie would have probably fallen flat. Fortunately for the annals of film criticism and film history, Anthony Perkins's portrayal of Norman Bates, along with Hitchcock and cinematographer John L. Russell's movie-making style, serve to turn Psycho into a classic. Perkins's ability to present Norman Bates to the audience as a meek, sympathetic character trapped under the thumb of an overbearing "mother" makes it all the more likely that the viewers will be stunned by the truth about the character's deep psychological disturbances and murderous tendencies. After all, Bates would go on to become one of the most infamous killers in film history partially because of the fact that the mental faculties that could lead to such a series of actions were not yet fully understood at the time of Psycho's release, nor were they talked about very often in everyday conversation. Hitchcock understood the power and unexpectedness of Psycho's ending, as well as how different his villain character was from the norm, showing this by both adding characters that explained Perkins's psychoses and family background and driving the point those characters made home by "[cutting] to Norman in a holding cell, grinning madly with his mother's dead face superimposed over his own" (27). Through this method, Hitchcock is able to explain to the audience just what could cause the mind-blowing, shocking activities they just witnessed. Overall, Psycho as a whole, including its psychologically-layered plot/ending and Hitchcock's genius at directing, storytelling, and cinematography; definitely deserves to be remembered as a masterpiece of filmmaking. However, this does not by any means prove that Psycho is the full, complete, and sole genre shift it is sometimes seen as, particularly in an area that is seen by some as one of its hallmarks of originality: its female protagonist.

Hello, and welcome to everyone's favorite weekly outspoken, slightly unhinged, stream-of-consciousness, brutally-honest, ad-critiquing review feature:

I come to you folks tonight in a rather interesting mood.  Tonight I'm glad about two things:  A federal appeals court decision, and This Film is Not Yet Rated.  First, in the time since my last liveblog, a federal appeals court threw out the fine against cbs for nipplegate at the superbowl.  I agree wholeheartedly with this and, to paraphrase lewis black, they should have because I watched that game and I know that no one couldve possibly seen ANYTHING because they cut away so fast.  The theory that the appeals court went off of (that the FCC was going against their past actions) is outstanding, and I hope it stands as long as possible...no matter what the Parents TV Council wants to happen.

Also, I'm in the process of watching This Film is Not Yet Rated.  Its a documentary I mentioned in the PG-13 horror discussion.  I'm loving it.  One thing, for example, is that the MPAA doesnt like sex.  It really doesnt.  It hates it more than violence.  You may think that PG-13 is a rating a movie gets when it has no violence.  No, PG-13 tends to mean no blood....hence how Dark Knight gets PG-13, not R.  Sex though can send them around the bend.  See the R rated Sin City and its high powered bloody violence vs some originally NC-17 movies that may have violence but only get notes on sex.  That and they're such a secretive group, you wouldnt believe it.  I highly recommend it, but its a bit tough to see.  Blockbuster wont rent it as its critical of them.  Netflix does though.  Why do I mention it here?  Because Mary Harron's interviewed in it about what she went through with the originally NC-17 American Psycho.  She says they had no comments on the violence at all (Chainsaw and axe murder).  They just didn't like threesome.  Interesting no?

And now, Mary Harron, directing tonight's ep.  I have high hopes for this because it seems like this plays to her strengths with how she examined the 80s culture in American Psycho in the context of a horror movie.  I think she'll be able to balance a social structure well in this in the same way, and I'm hoping I'm right.

And now onto the liveblog:

0959PM:  God Kath and Kim seems so arrested development-y.  Must watch.

1000PM:  Ok, so we're doing the flashbacky thing again.  Well at least there probably won't be nausea inducing pointless quick-cuts this week.  And I imagine the whole eps a flashback so that wont be as confusing as last week.

1001PM:  A Rue-Morgue Radio review of Hellraiser for its 20th anniversary release once said that it and Nightmare on Elm Street have staying power because they are based around domestic disturbance at their core.  I agree with them on that.  And I'm hoping that'll apply here.

1003PM:  We're having licensd background music in this ep?  that's new.

1004PM:  Lead actor looks like Justin Long probably will in about 10 years.  Just a thought.  And that was possibly the least tensioned opening of the series.  That may not be a bad thing here.  I mean we're talking Mary Harron.  American Psycho was a horror movie, but it wasn't only a horror movie.  I have faith in her.

1005PM:  I probably shouldnt like that chainsaw ad nearly as much as I do.  And I am so buying Harold and Kumar 2 on dvd next tuesday.  NPH forever.

1006PM:  Did he just.....BRENDAN, ITS THE 21ST CENTURY, NOT THE 20TH.  God I have such a bad feeling about this Mummy sequel.

1008PM:  I'm really really going to like this.  As has been well documented here, I have a thing about family values people.  And it's not a good sign folks that the furnishings are still there. 

1008PM 2:  OH RIGHT, Superman Brandon Roush is the star.  right......totally forgot.

1009PM:  Man thats a creepy realtor.  Seriously.

1010PM:  Personal conduct agreement?  I love a horror movie based in the horror of some societal norm.

1011PM:  MY GOD you're a creepy woman.  This is very stepford wives-esque thus far.  I have to see that movie at some point.

1012PM:  Can't stop thinking someone's gonna fire a gun and Roush is gonna jump in front and deflect it.....and you know what else this is similar to?  Family from Season 2, right down to a main character played by someone known for something else (George Wendt in that case).  The horrors of suburbia are always fertile ground.

1013PM:  The Faybors....the next-door neighbors.  My god I am so thankful I don't have any of those.  I try to keep separate from the downstairs apartment.

1014PM:  You pay whatever you want?  What happens if you choose not to pay?  I imagine itd violate the personal conduct agreement.

1015PM:  WOW These people are waaaaaaay too cheerful.  Which I imagine is the point.  nice atmosphere from all that.

1015PM 2:  See, this is how you insert commercial breaks into a show without breaking tension.  By having a general feeling of unease that you slowly amp up.

1016PM:  Lost Boys 2.  Yep.  It's real.  And apparently it tells us just how much Corey Feldman's soul is worth.  Whatever it cost him to agree to make the unnecessary sequel.

1018PM:  OH look.  A combination of about 80 other better shows into a possibly awful reality show called "america's toughest jobs".  God can you just feel the bottom of the reality idea barrel being scraped?  Now they're remaking THEIR OWN SHOWS.

1019PM:  Lol.  He looks like a waiter with that shirt.

1020PM:  Coooooooooooooool.  Status quo and the breaking of it are always welcome.  And nice fake out on the leg there.  that was great and darkly humorous.

1021PM:  What the.....awesome!  Although that was a terrible "Oh no" by brandon routh.  He can act better than that.  I think.

1022PM:  I wonder what he's watching?  the first one i mean.  Is it like when they used Imprint footage in Screwfly solution or did they actually film that?

1022PM 2:  Feels like a touch of Disturbia.  Not bad, since they arent HITTING YOU OVER THE HEAD WITH IT like in Eater.

1023PM:  Well DUH of course hes sensitive, you're not having a kid implies he cant give you one.  Of course he doesnt want to tell everyone.

1024PM:  This meeting is so creepily done.  This feeling of unease is very nice.  Now im thinking a blend of the horrors of suburbia and big brother.

1025PM:  God this is a great movie without an ounce of blood.

1026PM:  The fade out is very interesting here.  It's much better than the quick cut to black in every other episode.  It fits with the slow build of tension I'm seeing.  This is maybe the best episode i've seen yet.  Unless something inexorably dumb happens.

1031PM:  This really is amazingly creepy.  DONORS?  wooooow.

1033PM:  "you make it sound like a zoo".  Nice.

1033PM 2:  Ding ding ding.  First literal mention of civil liberties.

1034PM:  Where do I know that woman with the kid from the beginning from....

1034PM 2:  Complete freak?????  she doesnt CATCH THAT?

1035PM:  Nice change on Phil there.  Nice fakeout earlier too regarding his whereabouts.

1036PM:  Friend of mine just aimed me about how much this is like Hot Fuzz.  Again, absolutely right.  Again, good because I wouldve never caught that, so its subtle.

1036PM 2:  Given the choice of seeing Stepbrothers tomorrow, I've instead chosen to take two friends to see The Dark Knight (second time for me).  I think I made the right call.

1037PM:  HEY speaking of the Dark Knight....trailer.   And now I will make this pencil disappear.....

1039PM:  Also badly need to see christian slater in this new show.  Awesome.  My Own Worst Enemy looks great.

1040PM:  .......something's not right here.

1041PM:  Wow....I've heard fetuses can look like aliens...but that one, wow.

1042PM:  OOOOH!  NICE DICHOTOMY THERE.

1042PM:  God I love the creepiness and the "one of us" ness of this.

1043PM:  See this is what Spooked failed at.  It started its slow burn too late.  This, on the other hand, is a perfect build to this climax.

1045PM:  Again.  I know she's passed out just now,  but you don't notice that THAT'S what they're worried about?

1047PM:  Oh that is outstanding.  Are you seeing those kids PTCers?  Any of this seeping into that thick skull of yours?

1049PM:  Tell me this isn't great.  And notice how that fade out plays into the idea of going under the influence of that stuff.

1052PM:  YES!  WIN.

1053PM:  You know, I like the way this episode also has an undercurrent of Reality TV and its suburban populace popularity.  Its a nice possibly unintended sidepoint.

1054PM:  Is that a hockey stick?  And also, nice music on this chase.

1054PM 2:  and this is where we came in.

1055PM:  Oh that's just evil.

1056PM:  AND THATS JUST ICING ON THE CAKE, that line.

1057PM:  This oughta be an interesting shot......

1058PM:  Oh wow that is such an unexpected ironic shot.  I cannot believe they went in that direction.  That is brilliant.

1059PM:  I don't remember who directed Skin and Bones, but I think that's next week.

Overall:  This is the best mostly non-violent ep of the series and, for me, the best overall.  Harron nails how to portray just the abject creepiness of the society and fills the episode with just enough twists, turns, and tension to produce a great ep that could be made into a full-length movie probably quite well.  A great episode with generally good acting  (Roush messes it up a few times, but isnt distracting at all).  I highly recommend this ep to anyone.  I mean even the commercial transition type fit into the style of the episode.  A brillia