Hello. 

Before we begin, I should point out this will be different from the other site report.  For one, Fangoria is panel structured.  Monstermania has panels, but fewer of them.  Also, because of what happened Saturday, I missed all but one panel and all but one screening.  But that's ok, most were simple Q&As.  Also, Monstermania (rightfully in my opinion) tends to believe in free photos with celebs once you buy their autographs.  No tickets needed.  So lots of my freakish (heh) mug with famous people.  And, as a result of that difference, don't expect tremendous things like I did with each of the panels before.  While the signings were cool, I don't have paragraphs of material from them.  Still, as I've said before, I love this convention.  At it, the celebrities really seem to be glad to be there and the convention generally respects the fans. (with one notable exception.)  Oh, and I might mention things I got signed.  Hope no one minds.  So here we go.

FRIDAY

Remember kids.  Friday is always best for a convention like this.  Lines are short to non-existent in most cases, and the vendors have primo stock.  I NEVER had to wait more than about 5 minutes (but OH would I pay for that on Saturday).  Away we go:

NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET REUNION FOLKS FOR FRIDAY:

We have:  Penelope Sudrow(nightmare 3 "Jennifer Caulfield"..."Welcome To PRIME TIME BITCH!"), Brooke Theiss (Nightmare 4 "Debbie Stevens"...Roach Motel), Lisa Wilcox (Nightmares 4 and 5 "Alice Johnson"), Rodney Eastman (Nightmares 3 and 4 "Joey Crusel"...the topless women), and Lin Shaye (Original Nightmare (Teacher) and New Nightmare (Nurse with Pills)).  I also met up with Heather Langenkamp again.  But I already took a photo with her before so I sub that in here. (MY GOD...THAT HAIR....*cough*...never mind.)

So  Some of the people from the movie hadn't arrived yet (as you'll see on Saturday's group).  In general, all were awesome.  Sudrow asked for my email so she could get a copy of the picture.  Hasn't emailed yet, but I'll give it to her when she does.  Theiss, Wilcox, and Eastman were all genuinely nice.  Shaye was cool too.  Commented on her clothing chose.  Seems bright, fun, and cheerful doesnt it?  All were a bit surprised because the entire Nightmare group were in the room next to the Anchor Bay Booth...and Anchor Bay likes audience participation.  Over a microphone.  Thankfully I'd seen it before and was able to explain it to them.  Langenkamp was there for this and to promote her new directorial move in an upcoming anthology film called "Prank".  She, Ellie Cornell, and Danielle Harris (Halloweens 4 and 5) each directed a component.  I wanted to go to their panel early Saturday...but I was in a line.  Still, it sounds awesome.  I also inadvertenly minorly smudged an autograph I got from her.  She responded (awesomely) by putting her thumb in the smudge saying "now you've got my thumbprint".  Cooooool.

CORALINA CATTALDI-TASSONI:

Coralina Cattaldi-Tassoni of Demons 2, Opera, and most recently, Mother of Tears.  Super awesome.  I will come back to Mother of Tears in Saturday.  As for Ms. Cattaldi-Tassoni, she signed things for free if you bought an 8X10.  So i have an awesome Mother of Tears one with Argento doing his trademark, namely being the killer's hands.  Also, as a testament to her greatness, notice the open cell phone on the table.  When I walked up, she was on the phone.  I didn't mind and wouldve let her finish her call, but she actually put the person on hold and did my autograph.  Really nice.

JASON MEWES:

This is me...cheating again.  I've met Jason 3 times now, and I got a photo the first time, so I figured, why keep pestering for that.  Anyway.  Fact:  Apparently Jason's publicist doesn't know how to spell his name.  His poster (with photo of Jay) said he was (not kidding) "Jasen Mewes".  They had added red marker to turn the E into an O....sorta.  How do you mess that up, in THAT way?  He was super nice.  I was at the convention with my friends from Fangoria Con.  Jason had a hilarious conversation with one of them.  All in all, his usual awesome self.

KANE HODDER:

Somebody give me an acting gig.  lol.  This is actually the culmination of a mistake at my first con two years ago, Fango Secaucus 06.  At that con, Kane was there for Hatchet.  At the time, I didnt realize celebrities could charge (at that con, most I saw werent.)  So I saw a 25 dollar charge and said heck no.  Then.  Now, I'm not an idiot.  So here I am with Kane Hodder.  We got into a discussion about how Jason is similar to James Bond since so many people have played him (CJ Graham was next to him for example.)  He said he thought CJ did a great job as him and that each one brought their own thing.  He...also signed my copy of Hatchet with the word "Jason", but I think he was going on autopilot and its still cool either way.

A. MICHAEL BALDWIN:

Mike from Phantasm.  It goes well with Angus Scrimm's autograph from fango.  Great guy.

JOHN KASSIR:

You know those moments in life that you know are really important to you?  This is one of three from this con.  John Kassir, voice of The Cryptkeeper, Buster Bunny, and Santa's Little Helper.  (plus a stampede of wild animals Bart once unleashed.  Apparently you make a lemur sound by blending a Cat with a Raccoon.  The more you know.)  He slipped in and out of the Cryptkeeper voice FAR easier than I expected which was awesome.  For 25 dollars he'd also do your voicemail as Cryptkeeper or Buster Bunny.  We also talked about his acting episode of Tales from the Crypt, Oil's Well That Ends Well.  He talked about how much he liked doing it, how they incorporated the Cryptkeeper laugh into his character.  He also told me (I did not know this) that one reason they did that was that they thought it was one of the last eps.  But the show was picked up for another season shot in England.  Great guy.

JEFFREY COMBS:

This is the second one.  Jeffrey Combs, Dr. Herbert West (among many other things).  It occurs to me now, I really should have had him sign "The Black Cat" episode of Masters of Horror (as well as the Re-Animator he signed for me) so that i could continue my Masters quest.  Either way he was great.  We talked about his most recent role, that of the "Geek" in the Wizard of Gore remake.  He hasn't seen it yet.  I told him how much I liked it and asked him about his role and how they did it.  (As the geek, he bites off a rat's head and sticks his tongue in maggots and eats them)  He said the maggots were rice.  Also asked me if they'd CGI'd them so they looked like they were moving on his tongue.  I said, if they did it was barely noticeable as such, which is a compliment compared with a few bits of CGI in the film.  Also, while I was there, an employee brought him drinks from the bar.  Hilarious response when he tried it and saw its strength.  This is actually the second attempt.  The first photo was hilariously interfered with by.....

JAKE BUSEY:

Jake Busey of Starship Troopers and The Frighteners.  Jake was at the table next to Jeffrey and was messing with him (makes sense as they were both in Frighteners).  Their chemistry rivals that of Malcolm McDowell and Udo Kier at another con I went to who were sniping each other over their makeup and showing each other stuff they were signing. Awesome.  Also wrote "Got 1 More than Starkweather" on the dvd which is supercool (if you get the reference that is).

Not Pictured:  Derek Mears (new Jason from Friday remake).  Seemed super nice, but I just didnt have time;  The Lost Boys Reunion:  I'm sorry if you like the movie, but I've never seen it so I didnt spend the money on it.  My apologies if that disappoints you.  But speaking of the Two Coreys (who were there)

HOTEL BAR:

See?  Friends from Fangoria, Maura and Jessica (thanks again guys.)  It should be noted the next day I also ran into the folks from the Fangoria ice cream party.  lol.

Who else you ask?  Well that's where the Two Coreys come in.  The guys on my left and right are security guards.  The guy in front...is Corey Haim's assistant.  And thus, the one notable exception.  Corey Haim, from all I've heard, was not ideal.  He had a habit of leaving over and over to smoke packs of cigarettes, he was continually sipping his coffee cup (interpret as you will), he probably drove the other guy signing in the room nuts (more on that in a moment), and he lost it at one point.  See, Corey Feldman and his wife were elsewhere (smart).  But when someone mention in Haim's line that he had gotten her to sign her Playboy, Haim flipped out that she was there and signing, left the room, was seen gesturing pretty hardcore outside, then came back and did everything in his power to pretend to be happy etc.  Not Cool man.

I should also note, that this is far better than Fangoria's idea.  I just pay for the drink.  I don't pay extra on my ticket.  And after autographings close, the celebs filter through.  I saw the Nightmare reunion group, Coralina Cattaldi-Tassoni, the Lost Boys Reunion, Kane Hodder, and Derek Mears all passing through and ripe to have a photo taken if you were nice to them (i'd imagine).  Rather than stay to watch a midnight showing of Nightmare 3, I was tired and left sooo.....

SATURDAY:

THE LINE AND THE BURN:

Welcome to the first 5-6 hours of my Saturday, through which I missed the Prank Panel and Q&As for Jake Busey and Jason Mewes.  Where was I?  Outside.  In line.  I never even went inside.  Here we see the people who kept me sane in that line.  Not sure of the names of the two on the left.  They left when the wait crossed about 4 hours.  On the right (I think...) we have Heather and John.  Having people to discuss movies/remakes etc. with was invaluable in getting me through the wait.  Mostly the line moved at slow increments.  Took 2 hours to get shade (at least.  and me with no sunscreen, I got a minor burn).  I also didn't bring my book, even though it occured to me.  Heather was the smart one who did.  lol.  Also, a vendor came around at one point and doled out free comic books.  I got a copy of Ghost Rider.  Very smart of them.  The line stalled (while under the awning thank god) for an hour and a half while the person took a lunch we had been told about 45 minutes earlier (not his fault, he cares for his fans, thus he wanted to make sure they were all served).  Similarly, the previous night, Heather and John were shut out of autographs when the signing closed with 10 people in front of them.  (the person signing had been doing so for 5 hours, no breaks.  Definitely understand).  So.  Who was all this for?

ROBERT ENGLUND:

Now that's a photo.  I could've gotten my tongue out more though...I kinda look like I'm rolling my eyes.  Englund was awesome.  Highlights of his fans:  one person tried to get him to sign a Jason mask.  Don't know why, don't do it.  (he won't.  it's not his place.)  Another had him sign her arm.  She's going to get the signature tattooed on (AWESOME).

Corey Haim was also being annoying as all hell  (Englund was the guy I pitied for having to be in the room with him).  Random loud comments  when Robert would switch to Freddy voice (which is just as great as you'd think.)  You could tell Robert was really annoyed.  Englund also was selling various charms and actually, the backplate to the Freddy pinball machine (150 dollars).  I had him sign my box set along the side (he didn't like the effect because it meant they had to be together to read the signature...sorry about that mr. englund, just trying to be economical).  I also had him sign Dance of the Dead.  We got into a discussion about how I'd seen people bash it and didn't know why to which he wondered how people could bash Richard Matheson.  Awesome.  Oh. and...quoting:  "You got tongue, that's for the refrigerator!"

NIGHTMARE REUNION SATURDAY FOLKS:

We have:  Andras Jones (Rick Johnson of Nightmare 4...invisible karate), and Toy Newkirk (Sheila Kopecky of Nightmare 4..."wanna suck face?")  Not pictured:  Ken Sagoes(Roland Kincaid of Nightmare 3 and 4) who was there, but who I missed, timingwise.  They had both at the same table (space issues I'd wager).  Both were awesome.

TYLER MANE:

Tyler Mane, Michael Myers from Rob Zombie's Halloween.  Needed to have him sign an 8X10 Kristina Klebe signed at Fangoria.  Was super nice and liked what she wrote.  Note to myself though...if I'm going to try to mimic the person who I'm takin a photo with's hand gesture, I should probably LOOK WHAT HE'S DOING!  (IDIOT!)  After this, I headed upstairs for....

MOTHER OF TEARS SCREENING:

So.  My thoughts on Mother of Tears.  First of all, I should note, off the bat, that I have NOT seen Inferno.  It's in the mail and has been on backorder for over a month.  However from what I saw, that doesn't matter, as I still understood the plot.  Number Two:  See where that poster says "An Instant Cult Classic"?  Truer words have never been spoken.  Not kidding:  This movie contains:  a howler monkey of death, nudity, lesbians, gore, and a couple moments of ABHORRENT CGI.  The acting...particularly of Asia Argento...is pretty average.  And the script.  Oh.  My.  God.  The script...I have no idea what happened to it.  All that said....It's genuinely creepy, has fantastic gore, and, somehow, still has this feel of quality to it.  In other words, with all those problems, I LOVED THIS MOVIE.  Put another way, Troma once got a hold of Stendahl Syndrome and did a release of it (Blue Underground has the rights now).  Troma SHOULD have pushed to get this.  It would've fit right in.  A fun, popcorn, entertaining, cult movie.  Just don't go in expecting a life-changing experience.

NIGHTMARE PANEL:

Apologies for grain, but I was front-row, standing room and the light was dim (this is post photo-editing).  Left to right:  Lin Shaye, Rodney Eastman, Ken Sagoes, Lisa Wilcox, Andras Jones, Brooke Theiss, Toy Newkirk, Heather Langenkamp, Robert Englund.  Penelope Sudrow was there at some point I think, but I'm not sure.  I applaud Robert and Heather for steering questions and getting everyone involved since the crowd was asking them questions only pretty much.  Things you learn:  Kincaid and Joey would be an even match in a fight, Robert never understands how people claim there's misogyny in the Nightmare movies when a strong woman ALWAYS beats Freddy (I show that in my thesis), Robert's "suck face" with Newkirk was ruined on the first take when his Freddy dentures fell into her makeup prosthetic mouth, some of the scenes they filmed led them to nightmares later (like Heather having nightmares about Freddy's tongue wrapping around her head in new nightmare); Robert thinks that the original is scariest, Dream Warriors and Dream Master are best two-pack, and New Nightmare is his current favorite (it changes); Makeup is tough to do over such long periods, Robert has a lot of respect for Andrew Dice Clay, and lastly, Robert didn't know how he was going to do Freddy originally...until he channeled his jealousy of the looks of Heather and Johnny Depp into it and created Freddy, fittingly, out of it.  Great panel.  Overflowed out into the hallway and the head guy of the convention had them open the doors so the rest of the crowd could here.

SAW IV TRAP:

The knife trap from Saw IV.  Costs nothing to take a photo of it.  Costs 20 bucks to get in it for them to take a pic of you and put it in a stupid liner.  I like my choice more.

And now, my COSTUME OF THE CONVENTION:

This woman came dressed as Baroness from GI Joe.  Points for originality at a horror convention and the fact that runners up (Jason from Freddy vs. Jason complete with Freddy Head, and perfect Predator costume) didn't consider how hot it was and had to keep leaving and taking a breather.  And if anyone out there was going to say something about the fact that I chose a woman dressed in leather, I say, you must not have been at a horror convention before.  This is tame.  There were also schoolgirls running around among multiple other scantily clad women.  So give me more credit than that folks.  lol.

Up next:  PERICLES LEWNES:

Let me guess.  You're thinking "WHO IS PERICLES LEWNES?"  Pericles Lewnes has been mentioned on this site, here.  Yes, that's right folks, it's the 20th Anniversary of his Troma classic, Redneck Zombies.  Pericles was awesome, loved my shirt, and was also there promoting his new film, Loop.  I also mentioned our site to him and he gave me his business card.  I need to discuss something with Horror Czar about this which could be super cool *crosses fingers*.  Pericles was an unannounced guest fooooor.....

TROMA!!!!:

See, THIS is what Fangoria was missing.  I bought FAR too much at this table (don't ask just how much) and I still didnt' get all I wanted.  If they show at Chiller in Parsippany in October, I'm gonna nab copies of Special Needs and Dracula v. Frankenstein.  They were great to all comers.  This is the abbreviated version of their table.  Lloyd had the big stuff with him in Toronto at Rue Morgue's Festival of Fear.  It was, and is still, always a highlight of the show for me, seeing that the table is still there.

And with that, I bid you farewell.  It's 1151PM here on the east coast of the US and I am VERY tired.  Spent all night uploading photos, etc.  Had a lot of fun though doing this.  It was far easier than putting them on facebook, which I did first.  I really need to put away everything I bought.  I'll also be heading out of town Thursday night through Monday afternoon (going home home to New Orleans for the first time in four years (i was born and lived there 15 years).  Shouldnt cause problems though (liveblog's off for a couple weeks.  Dem and Republican Conventions.)  I will also be site reporting again in October for Chiller in Parsippany.

Until next time, this is Crypticpsych saying:  Always wear sunscreen.  And don't...do...smack.

-Well honey, what do you want to do tonight?

-We could go see that musical about the movie that most people only saw when they were REALLY stoned!

After digging around frantically for five minutes to find a digital camera I didn't even use, and then driving around New Brunswick, NJ for a place to park, I am proud to say that I did see a performance of THE TOXIC AVENGER:  THE MUSICAL at the George Street Playhouse in New Brunswick, NJ where it will continue to play until November 2nd and then will move on probably to places currently unknown.  The play is many things.  For one thing, at least here, it's a charitable donation set up for the Edison Wetlands Assocation of Edison, NJ.  (hence the two girls in toxic waste spattered bunny outfits at the door.)  The play is also just as manic and madcap as the movie it's based on and the film company that originally believed in that movie.

I had seats far left second row.  (I couldve had front row, probably should have....I didnt know how large the stage would be.  Had I done front row, I'dve been able to interact possibly with the actors since they came off the stage a few times.)  Now then.  For those who don't know, The Toxic Avenger is the heartwarming cult classic story of a 90 pound weakling who is picked on by bullies and popular kids until he is inadvertently thrown into a bucket of toxic waste, becoming THE TOXIC AVENGER!  As such, he crusades against evil, violently murdering criminals while protecting little Tromaville, NJ from evil and falling in love with a hot blind woman named Sarah.

That's the movie anyway...Play's a bit different.  The play is the story of how Melvin Ferd the Third, the 90 pound weakling and secret admirer of blind hot librarian Sarah, attempted to save Tromaville from the evil polluting mayor and was duped by her flunkies into believing she'd help the cause.  In reality she has said goons beat him up.  They throw him in a barrel of waste, bringing the avenger to life.  He then tears them apart and rescues Sarah from danger but has to hide his mutant murderous ways from her seeing as she's a pacifist.  Meanwhile, the mayor lurks trying to take The Avenger out and pollute the planet.  Will she succeed?  Will Sarah love Toxie for who he is come what may?  Will Melvin's mother ever respect him?

The play is fantastic on every level.  Stagewise, it's performed in the midst of numerous waste barrels that open, close, and turn to form various pieces of scenery (library, science lab, barbershop, mayor's office, toxic waste dumping site, etc.)  There's also a very good house band who performs from just above the waste area as part of the stage, providing the music for the show.  No orchestra here folks.  Violence and sex are of course plentiful (no nudity, of course, just to make that clear).  We're talking arms, spleens, legs, heads, intestines being removed.  The lines are all fantastic as are numerous styles of physical comedy (example:  During a love song, Sarah walks off the stage, out the theater, around the back, and comes in through the opposite door, singing and blindly oblivious the whole way.)

Songwise, the music is great with the lyrics being hilarious.  Songs include "Who Will Save New Jersey?", "Thank God She's Blind", Hot Toxic Love", "Kick Your Ass", and the immortal classic "Bitch/Slut/Liar/Whore".  It's also impossible to single one person out for a good performance.  Nick Cordero makes a brilliant Toxie while Audra Blaser's Sarah is a great package of hotness, humor, loyalty, and kindness rolled into one.  Nancy Opel nails a minor role as a nun before knocking roles as the Mayor and Melvin's mother out of the park.  This includes the afforementioned "Bitch/Slut/Liar/Whore" in which she basically sings with and gets into a fight with herself, singing as both the Mayor and Melvin's mother ("I can't even see her coming in here and talking to me....ITD BE IMPOSSIBLE!").

And lastly but DEFINITELY not least:  David Josefsberg and Demond Green as White Dude and Black Dude.  Never have two roles been so unbelievably oversimplified in a program.  Josefsberg and Green (over the course of the play) play:  Two toxic cleanup workers, the goons Bozo and Sluggo, old ladies, a mugger, a folk singer, various cops, the citizens of Tromaville, a scientist, a doctor, Sarah's best friends, Lorenzo and Lamas the hairdressers, garbage men, and members of a lynch mob.  And I'm probably forgetting something.   They deserve a standing ovation every night.

Overall, I can't give this a higher recommendation.  Like when I first saw Evil Dead the Musical in New York City at the New World Stages, it may have been based on a previous movie, but it's original enough to feel like something totally new.  Having seen the movie beforehand just allows one to get even more out of it.  Two thumbs way up and I recommend anyone who can get to New Brunswick before the end of the month go see it.  Tickets cost roughly 55-80 dollars depending on where your seat is.  Also:  Attending on October 30ths 8PM show will get you into a special post show party with Toxic drink specials, and an appearance by Lloyd Kaufman.  Halloween night will be a Halloween performance where showing up in costume can win you FABULOUS PRIZES!  Visit either linkor link for more info (and in the case of the first link to listen to samples of six songs from the show!)

And now for a final thought, here's a word from Uncle Lloyd:

I will never attend this convention on a Saturday again.  There I said it.  Fridays and Sundays for me.  Other conventions, they can handle Saturdays.  Like Fangoria and Monstermania.  Chiller unfortunately still hasn't grasped the concept that the hotel in which they hold it is TOO SMALL and that their physical setup is TOTALLY disorganized.  Let me explain:  Chiller puts "big people" in "the pit".  In that pit, it's like barely controlled chaos.  Lines intersect, people mill and cut.  The crazed Saturday version is not something I'd wish on anyone.  They then splinter the rest of the guests into 7-9 separate smaller rooms and a tent in the back of the building.  Methinks if you need to do that, you have too many people.  And that doesn't include the massive dealer room.  Doesn't mean I don't have stories and pictures though.  But from now on, if I do this convention again, it ain't gonna be on Saturday unless they have something really special that day.

Oh and one other point:  As you'll learn very quickly, this convention has NO IDEA what it is.  It's website has a blood red background, and they like to pretend to be a horror convention, but last I checked, the cast of Welcome Back Kotter wasn't really horror...Ralph Macchio wasn't horror....Erik Estrada wasn't horror....etc.  So I took pictures with who I wanted to (not those people who I mentioned.  This convention also tends to charge more for stuff and usually doesnt have celebrities who will take free photo ops.  Thus while I may have wanted Ralph Macchio or Jeremy Bulloch (The original Boba Fett) that didnt happen).  Even that failed since, as usual quite a few people didn't show (like Andrew Divoff of Wishmaster fame which I really wanted).  Oh and...no panels.  They don't really do panels.  Even if they did, they'd probably mess them up.  So yeah, here's my quasi-random exploits:

FRIDAY:

At this moment, I'd like to thank my friend Rob for attending with me to pick up some bootlegs for himself and taking the Friday photos you'll see below.  Now then:  After we hit the vendors room for many things (a few of which I'll disclose later), we headed to the pit.  On Friday, it's easier to do the line for the biggest celebrity because it doesn't go out into and around the hotel's courtyard.  So we only had to wait about an hour for:

LESLIE NIELSEN:

Leslie was great to talk to.  I told him it was hard to pick something for him to autograph since he had been in so many good things.  He appreciated the compliment and also appreciated Rob telling him that he liked his narration work in An American Carol.

FABIANA UDENIO:

I believe I once said on this site something along the lines that Chiller tends to get the people who no one knows...and simultaneously, everyone knows.  Example above.  This is Fabiana Udenio.  You know her better as Allota Fagiana from Austin Powers.  Or, if you're a fan of forgotten horror sequels, Dr. Hill's girlfriend in Bride of Reanimator.  She was really nice and still looks good considering Austin Powers was something like 10 years ago.  I asked her about my favorite subject:  censorship.  Namely how cable censored her character's name into Alotta Clevage because apparently we can't have the chill'ens hearing the name of the female no-no part.  She said they actually filmed it that way and planned it (the dubbing I mean) since they assumed it would have to be cleaned up for the basic cable folks. She was seated next to Kelly Jo Minter.  Why do I mention this?  She's from Nightmare on Elm Street 5.  I love the series, and I have no idea what role she played.  I'm not insulting her mind you, really.  But I gotta say...what the heck was she doing out here while Ed Asner was in a room with a bunch of people no one really cared about?  Again...organization.

I'd also like to randomly point out my awesome Return of the Living Dead shirt that I got at the last convention.  Ahem...MOVING ON:

DANNY WOODBURN:

Danny Woodburn was Angelo the Rhinette in Death To Smoochy (my interest) and was also featured in Seinfeld (which might be yours).  Was really cool.  Surprisingly, he hasn't been given any 8X10s from Death to Smoochy.  Says he's asked for them many times but they just won't give them to him.  This is actually the second attempt.  The first time, his Starbucks cup was in the shot and he didn't want to do the accidental endorsement.  He also got the Robert Englund treatment (meaning they put him next to Corey Haim).  Haim seemed to be better this time though.  He still took a ton of smoke breaks though.

GEORGE KENNEDY:

George Kennedy, star of numerous films like The Naked Gun and Creepshow 2.  He's a good guy.  His agent charges too much but he's a good guy who I still have a lot of respect for.  I think I was also pretty angry about how they set this up.  See, this isn't in the pit.  This is a room off the courtyard.  A very small one with Erik Estrada, Angie Dickinson, Linda Evans, and Morgan Fairchild.  I have never seen so many people in such a small place.  I'm shocked I didn't suffocate.  Erik Estrada might deserve that treatment, but not the other four.  This is why I don't like this con so much.

TIFFANY SHEPIS:

And this is why one does go to this con:  Tiffany Shepis from numerous movies including Nightmare Man and also formerly known as Super Tromette Dyslexia (hence why I had her sign my two volumes of Edge TV).  Shepis had a roll of stickers and was giving them to everyone.  There was a sign saying something along the lines of if you don't take a sticker the terrorists win.  Awesomely hilarious.  And, AND....she signed and took photos for free.  I know.  Shocking isn't it.  No one else at the whole con did it.  Shows a lot of respect for her fans.  She's definitely one of my favorite guests of the convention.

RON LESTER:

And now:  Ron Lester.  Remember when I said you wouldn't recognize people?  You REALLY won't recognize him.  Want some help?  Tack on 340 pounds.  Ron Lester was Reggie Ray in Not Another Teen Movie and Billy Bob in Varsity Blues)  He was an awesome guy, totally enthusiastic and appeared to be game for anything.  A great guy who also seems to be thankful and appreciative of his fans.

And now something more this site's speed:  WEDNESDAY 13:

Rocker Wednesday 13, of the albums Bloodwork and Skeletons.  Pretty chill guy.  Found out from his security or agent that the interview that introduced me to him on Rue Morgue Radio was done with Wednesday 13 in a parking lot.  Cool.  He autographs with just a W13.  I think I nailed the appropriate facial expression.  And he had an equally awesome shirt to mine (that's Johnny Cash flipping off the camera).  Which brings us to:

SATURDAY:

Just me and my abbreviated shirt o' 3000 filthy words and phrases shirt now.  Not pictured are me meeting up with Erin Brown again as well as Erika Smith (both from one of my favorite independent movies, Sinful) and Darian Caine.  Is pictured after TWO HOURS OF ANGER INDUCING PIT WAITING:

LINDA HAMILTON:

Linda Hamilton of Children of the Corn and Terminators 1 and 2.  This took more work and patience than you know. Imagine a rectangle.  Put Ms. Hamilton at one corner.  Then draw a line.  Going to each other corner in succession.  That's the line to her.  Now draw lines from the sides randomly bisecting it of other people's lines that started to cut in and hold the line up.  Took TWICE as long as it probably should have and was one of the most mishandled things I HAVE EVER SEEN.  But thankfully, Ms. Hamilton was awesome.  She was really enthusiastic.  Explained that the corn crucifixion at the end of Children of the Corn was uncomfortable but easier than it looked since they gave her footrests.  And we got into a minor discussion about how digital cameras take the review photo away too quickly.  She was great and seemed both enthusiastic and understanding about how annoying that long wait was.  A great ending even if it was unforgivably near-impossible to get there.

Two other special points:

1)  COSTUMES OF THE CON:

In order:  Ray Finkle Dolphins jersey (Ace Ventura originality there.  Gotta love it.  LACES OUT!), A Blackwater operative (used to be politically relevant..., Ghostbuster with actual autographed proton pack (proton pack's the only reason he's here), and Kid Rock (No, it's not really him.  He looks A LOT like him though.  He's just too tall.  Rob and I actually saw him swimming in the hotel pool on Friday and we really thought it might be the actual Kid Rock in town for a concert).  Not pictured:  The girl I saw from behind who was wearing a black thong and no bra.  Instead she had a wolf pelt.  The head was on her head, and I think the arm went over her breasts.  So my apologies to the men reading this...and maybe the women for all I know.  BUT:  The costume of the convention is:

REALISTIC BOBA FETT!  This gets it for its relevance to the presence of Jeremy Bulloch at the convention and it's detail.  (Note the missiles on the jet pack, the gun, and the slightly visible electrical message board on the chest.)  Outstanding.

and Finally, 2)

CRYPTICPSYCH'S DISCOUNT DVD TUTORIAL:

Here we have three photos:

A)  Grindhouse:  In this photo you see the two American two-disc grindhouse releases.  They were 10-13 dollars if memory serves, each.  Now, you can get them at 7.50 or 6 each at Target.  You also see, on the right, a bootleg I bought for 15 bucks.  It contains the Grindhouse theatrical cut and a bonus disc from the famed elusive Japanese 6-disc box set.  They even have the JAPANESE MENUS INTACT!  (I can figure out what they mean either by context or from the info on the dvd cover.)  Now:  That's roughly 45-48 dollars for the whole 6-disc set that is in Japan (the other 4 for them are our two 2-discs).  Now, it can be 26-29 bucks.  If I was to say...order the original from Japan, it'd cost however much the yen to dollar exchange would be...AND overseas shipping.  Do it yourself is always best.

B) You Can't Do That on Television:  (yes, I know a bootleg of Nekromantik is also in this photo.  It was 15 if anyone cares and has all the extras of the original foreign release.)  The You Can't Do That bootleg cost me 35 bucks.  It has menus, and good quality eps.  I believe they're taped off a vhs, which most of these bootlegs are.  If I'm reading the first disc right, this contains every season after 1984, or about 6 YEARS of episodes.  For 35 bucks.  I defy you to find that much of ANY series at that price.  (yeah I know, quality isn't dvd perfect, but when no one's gonna get off their butt anytime soon and make a legitimate release, sometimes you gotta make the sacrifice.) (EDIT:  OK, I'm still happy with my purchase, but I just examined the disks.  I got Eps 53-90. Not six years...more like two years.  And two additional classic eps.  This is what happens when you don't use a bootlegger you trust.  I may at some point try and obtain the whole series.  Or more than what I got here.  What screwed me up is the first disc has 10 eps.  He showed me that.  Not four of the other five that only have as little as 4.  So for now, I'm happy.  But if I see someone who legitimately has the whole series or DAMN CLOSE, I'm going with that.  I still heartily recommend bootleggers though.  And this very well may be the best I can do as The show is exceedingly rare.)

and C)  Ultimate Versus:  (Also got some midnite movies there including the spectacularly hilarious Food of the Gods and some classic Vincent Price, but Versus it the real star here.)  Say you want to buy Versus.  Usually you can go to...say Best Buy.  Maybe you can pull a 30 dollar deal.  Maybe a 40.  Or maybe you get the white dvd that is basically the simpler extras, etc for about 20 or 25.  This is the Ultimate Steelbook.  The one that would cost 30 to 40 bucks.  It cost me 20.  Because I bought it direct from the Tokyo Shock companies table since it's their release.  (I'dve bought Tokyo Gore Police, but that got pushed back to January, so they don't have it.)  Big time discount, no coupon.  And it's brand new.  So my general point is, if you know what you're doing, there are serious deals in bootlegs and regular dvds at conventions.  Use them to your advantage if you can (Rob picked up Are You Afraid of the Dark's 6 season run for 25, the criminally short run of FreakyLinks for 15, the show Monsters for 25(I think) and The Head MTV tv movie for 10. (Discount cuz he bought freakylinks from the guy earlier.  Great deals, none officially totally released in the US.)

So in conclusion:  Chiller is disorganized and horribly overcrowded particularly on Saturdays.  Outside of the novelty of most of their guests and the outstanding vendor room deals, there is very little I can recommend about this GENERAL convention.  It's still worth a look, but A) not near as good as ANY other con, and B) not even worth trying on Saturday unless someone amazing is there.  And now to rest for two weeks before what I'm sure will be a BARREL OF LAUGHS....Sawmania in Manhattan.  Thank God I'm going two days.  I can only pray that Sunday will be easier, but it being NYC I doubt it.

This is Crypticpsych saying:  LONG LIVE THE BOOTLEGGERS!

So I only did Saturday of Sawmania for many reasons.  One was that I've done a lot of conventions this year (Thisll make 7 I think), another was that I was tired from work.  So I hoped to be able to get this whole thing done in one day.  Oh how right I was.  I've never been able to be done with a convention faster than this one and probably couldve been done even faster had an unforseen holdup not happened.  So, by virtue of having a silver pass, I got into the convention an hour early (at 9).  However, I had a feeling itd be crowded, what with it being in Manhattan.  So I hopped a train in at about 714 (later than I wanted), and got there at 830(also later than I wanted.   I was planning on 7). 

I get in line to get in to the show just before they take all the silver and gold people to the side for early entry.  And that was how, inadvertently, I jumped half the line.  I tried to let everyone in front of me, but when you get a crowd of 20-30 rushing you, its hard to get everyone in front.  This is blvd, the Soho nightclub where the convention was held.  By virtue of the fact that the club is way on the Southside of Manhattan, it was raining, and the economy sucks.......

There was no one there (for a convention..there were people but the turnout was sad).  The first photo is of the line for Tobin Bell.  There wasn't one.  For a good 20 minutes.  I was no. 2 in line.  People came down the stairs to the room in the second photo where he was signing soon, but in total I waited (once he was there) 0 minutes for a Tobin Bell autograph.  That's unheard of.  (The guy in front of me thought hed be selling 8X10s and taking money down there, thus I took his place.)  The nightclub has this kinda postmodern industrial style to it...every room was kinda darkened and had red lighting...very appropriate for a Saw convention.  They also had the saw movies playing on flatscreens and the soundtrack going over loudspeakers.  After about 20 minutes...

TOBIN BELL:

Tobin was great.  He wasn't taking pics with people because of time constraints (I wanna think the people doing the show put them on him since there were so few people there for a convention on a Saturday it was sad).  I asked him if he ever thought that the role would become what it became at the beginning, to which he said they really had no clue even as they made Saw 2 and now he finds it fun!  After that I headed upstairs and got a second autograph ticket to go with the one I'd bought in advance for....

SHAWNEE SMITH:

Shawnee was super nice.  Total wait:  10 minutes.  (again, unheard of.)  I mentioned how I was able to write about the arc her character takes from Saw 1-3 in my thesis (haven't reached that part in serializing yet).  I also feel I should mention her current reality show, Scream Queens, on VH1 (where they look for an actress for Saw VI), and that she has a band called Smith & Pyle alongside fellow actress Missi Pyle.  Here's their myspace and website.  Have a look...it's kinda a country-folk-southern rock thing.  Pretty good music I think.  After that I headed to see...

BEVERLEY MITCHELL:

Total wait:  0 minutes (I said this was crazy easy.)  Beverley and I talked about the fact that her character's name (Laura) isn't really mentioned in Saw 2.  Like the victims are less the focus than Jigsaw and his philosophy on life.  She said she actually had to talk to the directors and writers because she had a feeling she'd need to know it for press things and conventions, etc.  She was great, energetic and seemed to be happy to be there and meet the people.  Then I headed back out front for:

COSTAS MANDYLOR:

This photo was at a terrible angle.  Total wait....wait for it....0 minutes.  Costas was a great guy...this photo's at kinda an awful angle because he's a huge guy and also the guy taking the photo was tall so I'm looking up at the camera.  I've heard rumors about him getting a bit tipsy at the party the night before.  He seems kinda like a guy who's glad he's got this guaranteed 4 picture deal the film gave him.  He was basically the host of everything from a tattoo contest to the parties each day.  So at this point...it's 1030.  I've done these 4 people in 1 hour.  Have I made it clear how INSANELY fast that is?  That left one other person:

BETSY RUSSELL:

Total wait...2 hours 40 minutes.  But I'm not mad about that (truth be told, I was mostly mad I forgot to bring Everything's Eventual...though I finished that this morning.)  Her flight had gotten screwed up so she had to catch a red eye and they let her actually get sleep which was nice of them.  She didn't get there till 1230, when she went to do the Q&A that was going on.  I have no report on that because I was in too good a spot in line for her.  I was on a couch and I was not gonna give that up when the line went crazy long.  I spent the two hours watching cartoons and Mythbusters on my Ipod.  And watching the guy next to me play Castlevania on his DS.  All and all, everyone was great and it was a good little convention.

There were problems though.  False advertising for one.  Betsy Russell being delayed so badly not withstanding, then there was the Scream Queens people (who I didn't care about) who rumor has it were supposed to be there at 430.  I was gone by 130.  Then there was the egregious error of the Saw Bathroom.  All the info said "Get your photo taken in the saw bathroom."  What they mean is:  HEY we've got a green screen.  Lie down, and we'll photoshop you into a photo of the bathroom badly.  That'll be 10 bucks.  (Um...no.)  They had a bunch of supposed contests they were going to do and trivia games...that didn't happen.  So while the celebs were nice, it wasn't much more than that.  Except for....

SAW PROPS:

I kinda tried to pick the best of the best of what I got.  There were a lot of tapes and a few other random things but at least I tried to go recognizable with what I presented here.  In picture order, you can see:  Release button from Saw 4, Saw from Saw, Syringes from the syringe pit in Saw 2, the one and only reverse bear trap from Saw, Jigsaw's blood soaked pillowcase and hair from Saw 3, a key used in the tunnel trap in Saw 5, Jill's keys from Saw 5, Jigsaw's syringe from Saw 5, a prosthetic appliance used in the pendulum trap from Saw 5, Jigsaw's last will and testament from Saw 5, Strahm's key from Saw 4, Jill's dress after the events of Saw 4, Dr. Gordon's foot, a fatman prosthetic I don't remember, Billy the Puppet (the icon), the trap Strahm ends up in at the beginning of Saw 5, and the chair and prosthetic "corpse" of the chain man from Saw 3.  (Phew)

And thus, after that, I headed out.  I was not about to wander around doing nothing for hours to go to the (rumor has it) ridiculously overpriced bar at the after party.  I was home by 430.  It was a very good convention for what it was and I'm thankful that I finally got to meet all these people (particularly Bell and Smith (who cancelled from two separate shows I was gonna go to.)  And thus I have no conventions...for about 4 months.  Before Monstermania with its Tobe Hooper and Fairuza Balk (sweeeet) and a massive Friday the 13th series reunion in March.  They may never do this one again since it was such low turnout, but I'm glad I was there for it when it happened if this was the only time and it was money well spent.

Until next time this is Crypticpsych with a final thought:  If you're going to hold your convention about the industrial gritty styled Saw movies at a trendy nightclub dimly lit and with an industrial architectural style with Saw music playing and Saw on tv screens, then....

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TAKE DOWN THE FREAKING DISCO BALLS!